8ish Things I'm Looking Forward To
1. Amy Winehouse. As my new, favorite celebrity, Amy gives me what the politicians give the late-night talk hosts - unlimited fodder. Any day with a little Amy in it is a day worth looking forward to. Why, just this weekend she had to cut short a comeback performance on St. Lucia because of heavy rains. That is her story and she is sticking to it. It had nothing at all to do with the fact that the fine folks of St. Lucia are too smart to pay to hear her. That is just a nasty rumor.2. The Gosselin's latest escapades. Oh, my bad. I really couldn't care less about these media hungry, argumentative, children focused lunatics.
3. Hunky male celebrities taking their shirts off. What? You don't look forward to that? I'm just being honest here.
4. Cheesecake.5. Any holiday that includes gifts for me.
8ish Things I Did Yesterday
1. As if I can remember.
8ish Things I Wish I Could Do
1. Earn tons of money blogging
2. Earns tons of money taking naps
3. Be President or maybe just sovereign ruler over whatever I want whenever I want. That sounds better. That way when I don't want to be in charge, I can just take a nap.4. Be invisible. I am just that nosy. Wouldn't that be fun to slip in anywhere and see and hear anything?
5. Have my eyesight and body back from when I was 18.
6. Never have to pay taxes, deal with insurance forms, or fill out any paperwork ever again. Period. Talk about a waste of precious time in life.
8ish Shows I Watch
Well, I only watch Lost and 30 Rock so I'm going to change this part. I'm going to say it is supposed to be:
What Television Would Look Like if I was in Charge Which Clearly Should be the Case
1. One reality TV show per station per week. Sorry reality fans. It's just like I tell my kids all the time until they want to throw up or stick skewers through their ears, "All things in moderation". I believe this saying was invented 500 years ago just so we'd have it handy for when reality television took over our world. This includes all shows that feature voting, screaming children who aren't being parented, or families with 6 or more kids that don't have a catchy theme song ala Brady Bunch. One per station. No exceptions.
2. More comedy. Good heavens, we all need to laugh. More Seinfeld, Will & Grace, Friends and 30 Rock type shows please. And you can skip the lessons learned or morals. I just want to laugh. A lot. Oh, and more I Love Lucy. That woman was a genius with great hair.3. More shows like Lost that make me think but that I can never figure out. I got hooked on this genre with Twin Peaks. Love it. I'm always confused but I know everyone else is too and that is a comfortable feeling for me.
4. No sex before 9 p.m. (On television. I really don't care what you do in your own home or wherever.) What happened to family hour? And this includes any commercials for male impotence. Occasionally I'd like to let my kids watch the Olympics or something without having to explain that bathtubs are not usually found in the wild overlooking bodies of water.
I'd also like to not see any more burger commercials where the woman is half naked and having a Penthouse Forum moment with her burger. I'm also tired of explaining to my teenage sons that the burgers are not that good.
Posts
113 comments:
I love your blog. Sorry I haven't left a comment sooner but my computer does not seem to let me pull up your comments page. I am writing this from my iPhone. Anyway, great post and anything with Daniel Craig in it has to be good!
www.whenpigsfly.squarespace.com
I'm all for male hunky celebrities taking of their shirts!
Is that last ad for real? Here it would be convicted. Probably the wrong word but my head is tired after finally doing my sales tax calculation. Incredibly degrading - the ad, I mean.
I think you should be in charge of tv.
I agree with everything you wrote! And please make the shirtless guys a regular feature.
Will and Grace? THE BEST! Loved that show, George Lopez too. Yes, you should be in charge of TV. I am also for hot, hunky celebrities taking their shirts off. Thanks for playing...as always you were very entertaining.
What a fun meme. I enjoyed reading this. I wish I could earn tons of money blogging too. Oh ya, I love male celebs without their shirts too. Yummy! LOL! Thanks for stopping by and have a great week.
That is hilarious. And yes you will make tons of money from blogging.
I get so frustrated with commercials during family shows! Especially when they are advertising another inappropriate sexy murder show coming up on that channel. So frustrating. I've written letters to the ad execs, but they don't listen. Maybe I should get the Gosselin's to write...
Hehehe....I have to admit, we're reality junkies over here, but only for shows that show an appreciable talent (dancing, singing). That way, it's like going to see a (possibly bad?) concert...and it's free!
Brilliant list! Except the male celebs can take their shirts off before 9 pm, right?
My favourite point is the not having to fill out paperwork ever again.
Amen!! Drives me crazy.
I totally agree on your take on t.v.! Except I totally have to get my dose of Rescue Me each week...sans kids of course. It's so inappropriate but SO good!
All very good! I like the napping and making money at the same time. I've got the napping part down, now where's the money?
I totally love seeing the actor who plays Jacob in the Twilight movies, without his shirt on, on all the ads. It's not at all creepy that he's like 16.
I hope someone puts you in charge of the TV programing soon, I'm really looking forward to that day.
i like'm all! yes, dear Amy does make life a bit more exciting, and shirtless hunky mean make everything feel all better :)
I tagged you too for a mother's day meme. My husband HATES burger commercials but what he really hates about them is the food close ups. He thinks Americans have the grossest food commercials.
I can't believe that's a real advertisement! For shame Padma!
My goodness, that burger ad is so provocative. If I were in charge of TV - and I should be! ;-) - then I'd ban all commercials. For ever.
Great post!
HEY what's that sound? Was that the woosh of a deadline flying by?
*taps foot*
waiting.
With you on that burger commercial. I mean, come on!
Great (half) list. ;)
Hilarious as usual. But I would rethink that invisible thing (just in case the opportunity ever presents itself). I once saw an X Files in which a man was hit by a truck within a few minutes of acquiring this ability. The driver couldn't see him... Maybe you'd want to combine it with an ability to predict what will happen in the next five minutes. Or just consult back episodes of Heroes for other useful superpowers.
You are so good! You can make anything funny! I am in absolute amazement and admiration! Very funny post! You are so talented!
That's too funny. Especially the Burger Commercials a la Penthouse...word to that.
Ahhhh...Daniel Craig! My morning is complete.
Okay, I want you to be president so you can do all of the things you listed.
Like the "sex" commercials, but they are drugs for it...you know, the ones with the porno music playing in the background for the little blue pill? Eww.
And, reality tv? No thanks!
Mmmmmm 007
Mmmmmm cheesecake
Huh, wonder if that is wrong I give the same reaction to both?
I am with you on the television. I was done with Survivor after the first season, same for Idol. I'm just not a reality fan.
Give me The Office, 30 Rock, Diners, Dives & Drive In (does that count as reality?), Food Network, American Dad, Reno 911, reruns of Frasier, Third Rock from the Sun & Seinfeld.
I needed a smile this morning so immediately headed to your blog. THANK YOU.
Did you deliberately put cheesecake just below that gorgeous-man-in-water photo? teehee
LOL - great minds do think alike (nice way to work in the ED ad :-) I've got this meme working today as well.
But not nearly as good as yours. Per usual.
Girl, you so funny!
P.S. thank you, thank you, thank you for the Daniel Craig shot. I haven't featured him over at my place for a while. Shame. On. Me!
I am anxiously awaiting the moment that napping becomes a paid occupation!
Hollyweird bigwigs probably won't listen to ya, but at least we can find (mostly) good, clean laughs here. :)
Just wanted to let you know that facebook has a new application called "networked blogs" that list a directory of blogs that their users follow - I signed your blog up in their directory list and signed up as a follower -I thought you would want to know! Hope you had a great Mother's Day!
I wish I could earn tons of money watching Lost and 30 Rock. And hunky male celebrities taking off their shirts!
Yes, I want you to be in charge of TV from now on!
I agree with the no sex before nine comment. I also hate when I am watching a family movie on television and they throw on some sex ad or a horror film preview. It's ridiculous!
Loved your post! Have a great Monday!
Great list, great you! Hope you had a super duper Moms day! I'm gone for a week in the sun! See ya when I get back =O)
Okay, I'll totally vote you in charge of t.v! (We actually put the kibosh on network t.v. for the most part, and bought all of I Love Lucy and old Seinfeld episodes and every season of Gilmore Girls (etc) on DVD.) It's ALMOST as good as tevo. Or at least I can try to TELL MYSELF that...!
T.v. has made good parenting hard work.
What... you mean you do not rock out to Amy W. while blogging? I thought I knew you.... hee hee
Fun post.... I missed reading you during my break from blogging, I'm back.
LOL... to burgers are not that good... LOL... they also don't look like the ones in the commercials either!
Thanks for a laugh!
ENJOY!
Fifi
Mmmm... cheesecake!
And how is it that everyone is annoyed by all the sex in the commercials and yet they still keep pumping them out?! It makes me crazy!
I think you're being generous with the amount of reality TV you're going to allow them to keep. Bring on the funny! There is enough competition and sex and violence out there in the real world - on the news - whatever. I watch TV for an escape from reality.
Also? Yay for cute boys sans shirts.
*chokes on her burger that really ISN'T that good*
woooohahahaha!
So what you're really saying is you wana go on holiday in St Lucia with Daniel Craig?
The Burger King commercial? You totally read my mind. Just what is more than a piece meat, I'd like to know.
I nominate you to head the FCC.
Oh I'm all for lots of those. Well blogged.
Those are absolutely 100% hysterically funny. I'd have to agree with practically ALL of them. you DO need to run for President --------Obama move over.
Love it, love it, love it! All great lists.
I really agree with the no sex before 9:00. On T.V...I have 3 very young minds in the house (not counting hubby). However before 9:00 would work for me since I'm well into my 40s now and pass out shortly after 9.
I love that you will always say exactly what you want to say and not allow a meme to limit you. No one else today has done the meme this way and I am entertained :)
Can we rule out bra commercials too? My nine year old is paying too much attention lately.
I need to incorporate "heavy rains" into my excuse repetoire. Gotta hand it to Amy, she's one smart crack head.
Here, here, on the Playboy Playmate burger commercials! I just don't' need to see other women's cleavage while considering if I'm hungry for a burger. Are we watching MEN'S shows, Debbie?
And heavy rains made me laugh.
I love this! You SHOULD be in charge of the tv! Their ads are really getting horrid lately! More and more I want to censor commercials! Grr.
HERE, HERE! I'm totally on board with you about the TV regulation thing. Bathtubs in the wild! That was hilarious!!!
Number Six is my all time favorite. Can you make that be a true thing please?
Ha ha ha! I hate those gross burger commercials! This was so funny and creative!
Egads!
And someone PLEASE ban the guy in the Burger King suit! Can he get any creepier? Shudder.
Love it. I definetly agree with more shows like Lost! That show seriously leaves me thinking more at the end of it than at the begining. :)
Now, I love reality TV...but I am with you on the serious need for more comedy! What I could do with out are the Howie Mandel shows.
I want one of those bathtubs, set back on the beach a little, allowing me to watch some of those hunky male celebrities.
hahah!! "Burgers are not that good!!"
Classic!!
I actually used to BE invisible... until the Tongginator came along. And - if you think I jest - have you seen the scene in the movie "The Princess Diaries" where the guy sits on her because he didn't see her? Yep... that was me pre-Tongginator.
amen, sistah'. I think we should watch tv together--you know, if there was anything on to watch!!
Oh how i miss the Bradys. . . When Greg looked at Bobby,who looked at Marcia, who looked at Peter, looking at Jan, who glanced at Cindy . . .
Loved your meme! I am a champion napper over here, too. I'm also SICK of the E.D. commercials. Ewwwww. I remember watching tv w/ my fam growing up and suffering through lots of Massingill "disposable douche" commercials. Ugh.
Now, who leaves a comment after 65 others? If you can give us such a post, eight multiplied a few times, I guess you're not afraid of numbers, insults or jokes.
Your Sanity is well preserved; and you're not even middle aged!
Agh, those arby commercials drive me nuts.
Ditto on the sexish commercials ban before 9:00 pm. Great answers.
What? I always look like that woman when I eat burgers...
And seriously. Shouldn't blogging pay more?
And lastly...what reality show would you watch if you HAD to watch it (or cut off your hand or something)?
I did this one today, too, but yours is way more interesting....
I hate - no I abhor that burger commercial! I think it is absolutely disgusting and I wish they would take it off already! It does not make me want that burger, it makes me want to vomit!
Yes, we all wanna see shirtless guys. I admit it. :)
Please can I sleep in that bed a while? I need a few extra dollars. :)
Rule follower that I am, it never occurred to me that I could CHANGE the meme! :-) I like yours a lot better! And Daniel Craig is always a happy sight!
Loved this entry. So true, so true.
But I'm distracted. I just blew my nose and it came out black. WTH?
Anyway...the Gosselins..uggghh!
And I used to like that show too.
XOXO
Maybe you should open a meat shop - you are quite a dady at the butchering.
Being invisible ... now THERE'S an idea!!
Hunky men, rawr!!! Yum-a-licious!
By the way, the intrigue with that last ad is the fact that she's eating fast food but is the host of Top Chef on Bravo ;)
Love it! All your 8-ish things are the best I've seen yet... ;)
CHEESECAKE!
Sorry.
I get excited when I see the word.
Anyhow, I also love Lost. I am so looking forward to the season finale on Wednesday. Though I'm sad I'm going to have to wait until NEXT YEAR to watch new episodes after that. Grr. Patience is not my virtue.
I have so many funny comments to make about this post. But it's late and I'm tired....but it really was hilarious!
Hee hee, great points! :)
If you find out how to make money from napping and eating cheescake, please contact me ASAP.
What a great meme! Love it! Earning money to nap is definitely a worthy goal!
Dead on, girlfriend. esp. the Department of Erectile Dysfunction commercials which I have spoken about ad nauseum. And the ridiculous commercials. You should do Phase 3. I'm only adding water.
Oh I know now you and I are kindred souls. I guess I was too busy napping to figure it out sooner!
I don't care for reality TV and wish more comedies were on TV in the eveings. I still love reuns of Will & Grace and everybody Loves Raymond.
I'm right there with you on the burger commercials. I hardly ever watch TV but when I do, it seems I always see the TRASH. Hugs***Renea
Hi, I'm visiting from MBC. Great blog.
OMG. That picture of 007 is the BEST EVER. I keep a copy of it in a secret folder on my desktop, to refer back to as needed. ;-)
And I love Amy Winehouse, too.
Great meme!
I DEFINITELY AGREE WITH YOU ON MOST OF THESE! I ONLY SAY MOST, BECAUSE I DON'T ACTUALLY MIND THE REALITY T.V.--IT USUALLY MAKES ME FEEL FAR SUPERIOR ABOUT MY OWN STATE OF AFFAIRS! (RE. SCREAMING, UNATTENDED CHILDREN...)
There is SO nothing good on TV anymore. We record the shows we like and hope that someday we may actually watch them.
I want to earn money taking naps! Show me the green. And please, please, more hunky male skin, cause I do love a six pack, and my own son's do NOT count.
She's holding a burger?
I love cheesecake!!!
You are exactly right about the commercials. They are totally out of control. I think this should be the next big blogger issue. I was actually planning a post about it for later this week. It's ridiculous!
I would like to see more of those burger commercials too. Wait you put a not in there. My bad. I always get hungry when I see that one. I like the bathtub on the beach. At least they are covering up the results of taking that little pill. And who doesn't love Amy. ME!!!
Just give me my eyesight back and send me lots of pictures of women. They don't have to be 18.
I'm so with you on the commercials. I don't even want to see a tampon commercial until.........well never.
Great job! I think I'm going to have some cheesecake now and then take a nap!
Great list. I agree with every one of your 8 Things I Wish I Could Do!
You need to give The Office a looksie. It comes on right before 30 Rock. ;)
That's all I'm going to say except for Ditto.
Good ones. Especially the TV, although I love me some reality TV so I'm pretty much glad you are not in charge of that. But comedies. Yes. Burger commercials with beef as aphrodesiac. No.
Nice! 100 comments! I could not leave it a nice round number for you.
HA!
101!!!!!!!!!
I can not believe you did almost 8 of each. You have endurance.
cheescake!!I'm all for that! yummy i want to have some right now!:)
So funny! You rock!----n---roll!
I'd love to have my 18 year old body back too, also!
THAT would be marvelous, plus I could eat and eat at that age and not gain weight at the nearly the rate I can pack it on now.
I am addicted to LOST. Great writing.
I'm told that the Baconator is a fabulous burger. I will have to try it sometime. Patties, cheese, and bacon... what's not to like?
:-)
Earn tons of money while taking a nap. I would like that, too. LOL
>3.Hunky male celebrities taking their shirts off.
>4.Cheesecake
Aren't these the same thing?
1. All for Daniel Craig with no shirt on.
2. Kate Gosselin is now apparently getting it on with the security guard.
3. That Hardee's commerical where she does bad things to that sandwich freaks me out.. it doesn't make me wanna eat it.
They should use Amy Winehouse pics as a visual in Scared Straight training. **shudder**
yay 30 rock. yes i agree more comedy. unfortunately it's looking like more variety/game shows these days.
I think I'd like to be able to do everything on your things I wish I could do too! Except for the eyesight...I've since had lasik and would never go back to glasses. Lost rules - can't wait to watch tonight.
I am so with you on number 4! In fact I'm working on a project so moms can complain more easily about stuff like this. I'll let you know when I've got it up and running.
LOLOLOLOL!
Oh, and if money could be made by napping, I would be the wealthiest woman alive...
I couldn't agree with you more on the family tv hour! I sometimes fold clothes and watch a dvr program. I'd like to not have to shoo my kids out of the room when I forget to FF the commercials.
Gotta admit that I love me a reality tv show or two. Sometimes it's the only way to see a hunky male sans shirt! :)
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