One day she shared two pearls of wisdom with me that I will never forget. She told me she had two regrets as a parent - not standing up to her sons' teachers when she should have and not reading aloud to her sons as they got older.
When a teacher you admire tells you she should have stood up to teachers more, it makes an impact. Gives you a certain sense of "empowerment" that you might not have felt otherwise.
And when she says to continue reading, you try to do that as well.Sadly, we don't read aloud to our kids anymore but we plan to start that again now that those older, busy teens are moving away to college. That might be a lovely return to an old tradition to ease the shift in our entire house.
But, until a few short years ago, we read to our kids - all of them - each and every night. Sometimes we let them chose what we read but more often, I researched books and brought ones into our lives that I thought they might not get exposed to otherwise. There are some fabulous children's and young adult books out there that don't make it onto the required school reading each year. I could do several posts just about them.What I cherish the most, and I think each of my kids would agree with this, are the traditions we also established.
We read the Little House series each time we had a child in first grade. Which means that except for my youngest who was a newborn the first time we read them, each child heard them out loud three times. And what wonderful, classic tales. Every home, whether full of girls or boys, should contain that set of books.
We read the Narnia series when we had a second grader. Yes, there are some battle scenes and difficult moments in those books. Cozied up in your lap, a child can handle those and learn that difficulties do arise in life and he will be OK when they do. We love those books so much, we've named three cats after characters in those books - Lucy, Mr. Tumnus, and Bree. You gotta love a literary family.
I have made so many mistakes as a mother. I'm sure several therapists will make quite a bit of money one day listening to my kids list the mistakes I committed. But I also bet they will one day read both of those series of books to my grandchildren. Because that was one thing I did right.And on the rare occasions I find need, I stand up to their teachers.
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115 comments:
I LOVE this post, Debbie! Well, what posts of yours don't I love? ;)
Princess Nagger is starting first grade this year. She was blessed with an awesome kindergarten teacher who was a real joy - I hope her first grade teacher is similar in nature. I LOVED reading the Little House series and the Narnia series when I was a kid - I do still read out loud to/with the Princess Nagger, so I think I'll be picking up the Little House series to start reading to her this year...great idea!!
And, if I find the need, I'll be standing up to her teachers, too. ;)
We too had good kindergarten teachers. My hubs teaches in elem school and he tells the parents on curriculum night that age 10 and 11 is still not too old to read to the kids--they need it and he reads aloud to his students. (then I do the reading at home as he is pretty worn out from the 25 all day!)
I have had to stand up to teachers in my kids 5th and 7th grade years last year.
Great post!
Pls do suggest books for the middle school crowd when you get a chance!
Reading is such a gift to a child. I plan on sharing the only series my Dad ever read with us, The Lord of the Rings.
What great advice she shared and what a wonderful tradition your family has!
Great post--and a good reminder to me that I should read out loud to my girls more. I fondly remember my mom reading The Secret Garden and The Twelve Dancing Princesses, among other things.
When the girls were young, they knew that I would always choose reading a book to them over doing dishes or mopping the floor. Our house may have taken a bit longer to get clean, but I think that was one thing I did right, too.
We read to our son as long as he would let us and sadly, it ended around the 6th or 7th grade. Oh, and our son did have a teacher in the 4th grade that I did have to stand up to. I agonized over it at the time, but have not regretted it for a second since.
I used to read aloud to the kids every night and we've fallen out of the habit. And we were halfway into the first book in the Narnia series when we fell.
I think I'm going to suggest that we start from the beginning and give it another go. Tonight!!
Reading is such a wonderful thing to share...you can go anywhere in a book!
I read to Pitcher when he was young...I am saddened to say he does not enjoy reading as I do. But that does not stop me from buying him books for his birthday and Christmas every year. And it never will.
That is 2 great bits of advice...I wouldnt say i stand up to the teachers but I can say I have stood up for my children to the teachers...
Fab Post as always
I will have a first grader this year! Time to pull out my old set of Little House books.
You made me think of my kindergarten teacher....loved her! And I loved the Little House series when I was younger - I so wanted to be Laura Ingalls.
Some of my best memories with my mom are reading together. I hope that holds true with my kids as well!
Debbie you are so right about the books. I am so disappointed that so many of the classics are not required reading.
I required my girls to read the unabridged version of "Anne of Green Gables". We wound up reading it aloud because they could not understand the language of the book. ...One of my better "Mom" moments that I hope they remember fondly.
I guess I am a bad mom...
I taught them how to read even before kindergarten. I wanted them to be able to read on their own a little at bedtime. They still read, but we spend a little more time on their guitar and saxophone music.
Great books! My sister's children expect to be read to before they go to bed at night. They get to pick two little books to be read...then they have to go to bed. My sister also doesn't really allow them to watch much TV. They're encouraged to read and play instead.
Folk of the Faraway Tree....the Magic Faraway Tree.... need I go on? :))
Oh, Debbie, this post made me all teary-eyed remember my grandmother, who lived with us, reading to my sister and me. We loved it so much that we are both still avid readers. Still now, I love audio books because I feel like I'm being red to again! And on road trips, my husband and I take turns reading to each other! Wonderful post!! Hugs, Silke
Great advice. I wish I had been read to when I was little. I wonder if it would have made it easier for me to learn to read. It was such a huge struggle for me that I make sure we read to our kids nightly.
I'm putting little house on my list for this year. Do you have any other great read out loud suggestions for little boys... 1st grade and Kindergarten? We actually already did Narnia, but a condensed version.
Why did this post make me cry?! WHY?! I'm taking your advice & doing some of my own research. Dr. Seuss is getting old in this house.
i love reading thanks to my mother. and i'm sure one day (if not already) your kids will be thankful as well
Well, I teach in a community that has NO problem confronting teachers.
But, all parents should feel comfortable talking with their child's teacher. It's so odd to me when a parent is afraid. Go. Do it.
It's your kid.
Now, the reading aloud.
I wish the ritual of reading to children and having them read to parents would go on and on.
Why not read the classics together when kids are older? Or just have a dinner night that's all about sharing what each person is reading.
Love this post.
Lovely post! Thanks for sharing your wisdom.
The reading is important. I've slacked off this summer, and I feel guilty, but school will be starting soon and we'll read every evening again. After reading your thoughts, I feel compelled to continue the tradition as long as they'll let me. :)
I love a house full of books. Last night my son went to the bathroom at about half past one. He kind of slept through the whole thing. When I tucked him in, he said the cockroach was still in the drawer, which means he was still thinking of the story we read just before he went to sleep. That made me very happy.
Thanks, Debbie. My husband and I are not stander-uppers, but if we don't do it who will? I love this post.
Myrnie and i received those books as christmas gifts the year we were...7? Probably younger. I remember, my father read the first two books in the Narnia series to us. Then, one night, we came to him with the book and asked him to continue. He looked us in the eyes and said, "No. You know how to read now. Go read it to yourself."
We were SHOCKED. We thought we had to wait for him to tell us what would happen to Mr. Tumnus and the gang. We started reading to ourselves that night, and never, ever stopped. To this day, I prefer reading to myself to listening to someone else read...my mind tends to wander, but I will ALWAYS be grateful that my father said "no" that night. It changed my life!
Wonderful traditions Deb! I wish I had read to my kids for longer....
Fabulous advice! I read regularly to my kids before they could read on their own. I've gotten lazy with it lately. Thanks for the nudge and reminder!
My parents didn't read aloud to me but they did instill a love of reading that lives on in me to this day.
In fact I give books as gifts to my nephews and nieces - whether they like it or not.
Great post! My family and my husband's family are all readers. Books are so wonderful!
I think we would not be that way if it were not for our parents and some amazing teachers.
I still remember my 5th grade teacher reading the Wind In the Willows to us every day after lunch. What a great memory!
Wonderful post. We are a family that has always read aloud together. My kids were growing up on the jungle without TV or electricity and it was the high light of the day to be read to.
Now we all share so many great literary memories. Often we will find ourselves laughing as we recall scenes read together. It is a true bonding experience!
Two great pieces of advice! I have always read quite advanced books to the kids so that there English vocab is advanced for their age (remember that they are speaking Swedish everywhere outside the home).
As for standing up to the teachers - I've already embarrassed by daughter in the one year she has been at compulsory school! ;-)
Hi! I saw your comment on Cheap & Sweeet. Had to come over visit with another fellow Tennesseeian!
At what grade level would you suggest reading aloud Tolstoy, Hemingway, or Kafka?
I remember being a voracious reader, but I don't really remember my parents reading to me aloud.
I plan to read aloud to my kids. US Weekly and The National Enquirer top the list.
You are a fabulous mama!
I loved the Little House books as a kid.
I love this post... yes that is something I wish I had done more of, reading to my kids.
I did read, they read, and now they read to their kids .. being a grandma now.. it is not to late to read some more!
Love the idea of reading the series, that would stay with them forever!
I loved this post! So sweet!!
My kids LOVE it when I read books to them! Sometimes I'll let the older kids read to the younger ones too!!
My mom used to read to my & sister and I before we'd go to sleep, and she gave me the love for reading!!
I fought several battles over the years pertaining to my kids and their schooling however they were mainly with the administration. Sadly, I think I lost just about all of those fights. But, my daughter, Mandy -whose two little ones are both autistic -has learned and exercises this aspect frequently as she has to negotiate IEPs for both kids and she has both the temperment and courage to do this whenever and wherever the need arises. And I say Good for her for learning this lesson early on as they will need that kind of advocacy over the coming years, for sure!
Being read to is one of the most calming/relaxing things for me.
I need to be doing it more.
Thanks for the reminder!
I love reading to Lorelli. Right now, she loves reading to me. If it s a new book, then she will make up her own story according to whatever happened in her life that day (she is only 3). And if it is a book she knows, she will try and recant the story to me. She has also taken to reading to me the exact story. O.N.E. L.E.T.T.E.R. A.T. A. T.I.M.E. It is so precious. Long, but precious. I remember having teachers read to us...all the way through 6th grade social studies where Friday afternoons our teacher read to us aloud form books such as Around the World in 80 days.
My mom read the Narnia series to me as a child and I plan on reading it to my kids as well. Great advice.
Beautiful idea!
I've had to alter things a bit with my son...he's 7, but developmentally, more like 4.
So I'll probably read to him and his sister at the same time. :)
Unfortunately, Parker has never really enjoyed books or reading. Autumn does.
Me? I'm a bookworm through and through. :)
Good advice is a wonderful gift. Not enough of it around!
I have never even thought of reading to the kids as they get older (as my parents never did), but it sounds like a nice tradition! :)
What a wonderful kindergarten teacher your children have all been blessed with!
Love this post, I might have to come back to it for reassurance if I need to stand up to some middle school teachers this year.
i love the little house series....so much great food descriptions! thanks for stopping by my blog!!!
It takes something, I know, to read to your kids every night, esoecially if you're dog tired (as i am most nights) and all you want to so is sleep yourself! How old are they in second grade? Can't wait to read the Narnia books to my two!
Sorry for the mistakes in that last comment - you can see how dog tired I am!
I'd love to read a list of your parenting advice!
*connie goes to read to her kids before it's too late*
I'm so glad you did this post. I THOUGHT this was where I got the idea of reading "the Laura books" (as my girls call them) to my girls in first grade... only first grade was just over, so we started and will finish during second grade. We're going to read "Anne of Green Gables" for third grade, but I think we'll adopt the Narnia books for 4th grade. PERFECT! I think it won't even be overlapping so that we'll have to get through two series in one year.
I LOVE reading aloud to my kids. OK, I don't necessarily love reading aloud. My voice gets tired. The restful position makes ME tired. But it's still one of my favorite times of the day. I've always done it, and I won't stop just because they can read themselves. (Said second grader read "Little House in the Big Woods" on her own today and "Charlotte's Web" another day and who knows how many other books this summer?)
And I also loved the advice. I feel like I need to stand up to a teacher, but I don't want to be one of those complaining parents. I think I will have to do it regarding one topic. Thanks for the empowerment!
We read those as kids growing up and I plan on doing the same! Great post.
FAntastic post and good for you for reading to you kids! I think it has a huge impact on them.
xo
this post brought tears to my eyes (i know, i'm a dork)
out of all the craziness in our day, it is the calm perfect part. every night i read to my kiddies and i LOVE it so much.
we are reading the magic treehouse series right now, VERY highly recommended :)
thanks for the GREAT article.
What amazing advice! And for a teacher to say to stand up to teachers when they are wrong, she must be fabulous. I read to my girls too. My 7 year old can read chapter books herself, but I still read to her too. I love it!
I loved The Little House on the Prairie Books and the Anne of Green Gables books.
A hearty AMEN to both!
[Of course, because we homeschooled I'd have been standing up to myself...but since I sometimes talk to myself, that would not have been so unusual. LOL]
A good reminder for me :) Now that our daughter is reading to herself, night and day, I'm less motivated to read to her myself. But I will!
Fantastic!
I always read to my children. I love to read and I'm hoping they will too.
I LOVE Little House on the Prairie by the way.
These were two very important points to make.
I think in the big grand scheme of things you are an awesome mother!
I'm going to squirrel these away for when I have kids...
What great advice! We have great memories of reading out loud as a family..."Read one more chapter please Mom!" was said quite often. Thank you for reminding me of this wonderful time we had...now that they are grown and gone, it's things like that I miss.
I'm glad you did. My daughter has had good teachers and not so good ones. The not so good ones are very defensive at the drop of a question. It's a good tradition to establish!
I love this - I need to DO this! Once our oldest was able to read (and read amazingly well for first grade!) she sort of 'left' story time b/c we were reading to the little ones. Thank you for the reminder that it's still important.
We used to read to our kids every night. And they now read to theirs.
Its kind of like swine flu, it's catching.
Little House and Chronicles of Narnia are both excellent suggestions. You just can't go wrong with CS Lewis . . . and in this economy, Little House will inspire and take away any lingering pity. We've got Narnia in books on tape but nothing replaces a mom or dad reading. Thanks for reminding me of these classics.
And thanks for reminding me of my own family reading traditions. We'd gather every night in the living room and my mother would read aloud . . . Willy Wonka, Aesop's, etc.
After this gentle nudge, I can assure you we'll be back at it, as soon as school starts.
My children always had the option of going to bed at their regular time or staying up an extra half hour and read. They always chose to read.
I love that you read the entire series to your children, how great that is and what a memory they will have. I am sure they will probably do the same with their children :)
So lovely of you to say "rare occasions" so as not to offend your teacher readers like me.
But, I do agree. Voice your opinion. You are your child's advocate. Good advice.
Great book selections, too.
Great post! How do you feel about your use of the timer? ;) I read to my girls before naptime and before bedtime every day. The Little House books would definitely make my list, as well as A Little Princess, and pretty much anything by Beverly Cleary. :)
cool choices of books..
one of my 3 year old twin girls is very avid reader...other one we have to coax to read...but she is getting there...
Great post! You know, I think second grade was the year I received the Chronicles of Narnia, and Aunt LoLo received Little House on the Prairie, as Christmas gifts. Our parents read to us every night until the night Aunt LoLo tried to pick out a story and Dad said "Why don't YOU read it?" It had never occurred to us! We were just reminiscing today how we would stay up all night reading, see the sun coming up, and think "huh. it's morning!" and pull another book off the shelf :)
Absolutely you did something right. I read to my older two boys until they were each 14. The poor younger boy only until 12. That's when those older boys and all their activities taxed my time. Of course, the youngest has had a completely different upbringing being third in line. But all that hasn't been bad. I asked the other night what their favorite books were - Indian in the Cupboard, Hank the Cowdog, Roald Daul books - The Witches. Amazing what they pull up to recall those stories.
Fine post.
Great post! I was a teacher for ten years and I ALWAYS encouraged parents to openly communicate about their child. If you don't, then who will? And I should be reading more than I do with my son as well.
Thanks for bringing these two things to light! :)
What a great story! I love to read, and one of my favorite things to do with the older kids is snuggle up in bed and read together. I "read" with my toddler as well, but his attention span only allows for so many words before he's bored and hopping on to the next thing.
Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest! (Such a tongue twister, that one.)
This is also the first time I've visited your blog and I love it.
what a wonderful tradition! there is so much to get out of this one! we read to our girls every night! either myself or my husband, usually if it was my husband he feel asleep and my daughters would pull at his glasses and poke his nose LOL but there are so many wonderful mememories we have about reading different books together. i'm stopping by from sit's saturday sharefest and wanted to wish you a wonderful week! stop by and say "hi" if you get a chance! i do a lot of "writing" on my blog about my family and this week i have a giveaway too, so love meeting new sista's so "holla" anytime!
smiles,
shelley
http://iamstillstandingafterallthistime.blogspot.com
http://theplaygroundprincess.blogspot.com
I remember reading those Little House books. They were some of my favorites!!! I read to Bella everyday and we are major book readers here!
What wonderful traditions! I may do something similiar with my children! Thanks for the ideas!
I loved the Little House on the Prairie series and I can't wait to start reading it to my neices! Thanks for the reminder of all these wonderful children's stories out there. Today's pop-culture reading seems to be all about sexy teen vampires - but they are here today and gone tomorrow. Today's books for youth just don't hold a candle to the classics.
Sometimes I learned more from a mistake one of my parents made than from something they were "perfect" at. But the love of reading, instilled in me by my Mom, is still one of my greatest joys. ~Mary
I wish I had continued reading aloud to my kids as they got older. We did reinstitute once when they were both in the upper elementary grades, but somehow it fell by the wayside. That is one of my (many) parenting regrets.
We have read 2 Narnia books, they loved The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe. They are having a hard time getting into The Horse and His Boy. I have not been very diligent this summer....I have let them stay up later rather than go to bed at a "reasonable hour". I should look into the Little House series. Thanks for sharing!
Great pearls of wisdom!
I so agree - why stop reading when they get older? Heck, I still like being read to and I'm nearing thirty.
And I love the other advice too. I tend to keep my mouth shut in any sort of confrontation, but I do know I want to stand up to teachers if I think there is a problem. So it's great to hear a teacher say that.
we had the most amazing kindergarten teacher last year and i wish i could have her teach all of my kids!!! and i agree that when need be, we need to stand up to their teachers. fantastic post!
We enjoy reading aloud with lil' D. We each take turns and he picks out which ones to read. He is still in preschool and will start kindergarten next year. Very exciting. As a kid I couldn't stand reading. I would race through a book just to finish it. I don't want lil' D to have the same ambition. I love the Little House series. I still watch the Tv series on Hallmark. Take care.
-Kiki
I am going to get a book out right now to read to Kaishon tomorrow night. I have been meaning to start something this summer and I keep falling for the easy picture books by his bed. We need a good chapter book!
You inspire me!
I have stood up to teachers many times so far. I try to balance out standing up to them and also encouraging Kaish to be better behaved. It is a CONSTANT battle.
His school got off to the wrong start with him and I think they can not see past the naughtiness of a few years ago. He is doing so much better now, but still I get constant calls. I mean CONSTANT!
And I hate to say that it is because he is one of only a few black kids in the school, but it does cross my mind.
Will you pray for us this year? I am worried about it all ready and school hasn't even started...
Thank you Debbie!
I learned to read very early and so I don't remember being read to very much. What I do remember is always having a big pile of library books, and Mom and all of us would settle in and read together. I do think that seeing Mom read a lot influenced us.
I feel sorry for some of today's children who are sat in front of DVDs for their bedtime stories. I loved listening to Heidi when my mother read it to me - I was right there picking flowers on the Alps!! My first daughter could recite several of her beloved stories by heart by the time she was 5 and my second read all of her favourites to her toy animals when she was seven!! I was so sad when they no longer needed me to read to them. P.S. I still buy children's books from time to time - for ME! I love the illustrations!
Hee hee...I love your blog. I needed a good laugh this morning.
I'm a stalker, I mean follower, now.
This is so true! And yes, reading is so so important! Loved both of those series although I only saw the Narnia's on film. I grew up with Laura Ingalls Wilder. Such a great series!
And those first 2 years of school I think set the pace for the rest of your school life.
Hello!
So you were the comenter above me on Beyond the Picket Fence, I try to visit the SITS girl of the day, and even the comenter above me.
It's been a while since I've done either, but I am glad I found you. You have a fun blog, I will be back for more!
Queen of Feisty
Glad you stopped by and entered my contest. You have a great blog. thanks
kim
I used to read to my son every night - can't remember when we stopped that - he's 30 now, and not a big reader like his mom, but I'm glad I did it....
I have met you and heard you talk about your family - you are a great mom - a really good mom and a good person.
Excellent wisdom.
Thanks for sharing.
I love that idea. We definitely read aloud less, but we still do it... for now. And I think we'll need to keep it up. I love the idea of reading Little House on the Prairie in 1st grade.
And the teachers? Yeah... I'm already there. And the teachers at least recognize that early in me, I think -- in a good way, I hope. I also help out in the school a ton and am not a pain just for the sake of being a pain!
totally amazing your blog
xoxo
nic
I loved reading your blog; I seriously doubt that your kids will ever need therapy; sounds like you've done a great job!
just dropping by from SITS to say hi; hope you'll do the same.
Thank you for these lessons. Since my oldest two can read now we've gotten out of the habit of reading to them. I'm happy to start back up again - it's really a wonderful bonding experience and I feel gives some much needed one-on-one time in this busy world.
Establishing traditions is essential. I wish I'd implanted more, but since the nanabies have arrived, we can certainly start over again. You're right.
Smart teacher.
I just found your blog and enjoyed it so much! I loved the Narnia books and read several of them to my 2 kids, but unfortunately, I never finished the series. I do wish I had found more time to read to them, and now that I have a grandson, (and another on the way!) I'm hoping to read more often to them.
I'm a teacher, and I can tell you that Yes....sometimes you really need to stand up to us. Sometimes we don't know what is best. As for the books, ah...the reading teacher in me delights.
I was obsessed with Little house books. ove them. Great advice!
Narnia rocks! And so do you - best mom ever.
I think I needed to read this. I really should read to my children more often. But it seems like I always let bedtime slip up on us and there's no time. I'm going to make time! I still have the Little House series from when I was a kid.
Thank you for stopping by my blog!
I love reading to my little man, when he will sit still that is. He's 13 months and always wants to be on the go. I still the Little House backs and I'm 30 years old!
Great post! :) I am very passionate about reading... my husband, not so much. But, much to his dismay (and my joy), I have a TON of books in the house... and my son is only 21 months old! He already loves reading, and I couldn't be happier! He loves choosing books to read every night before bed, and he could read with me all night if I didn't stop him to get ready for bed! It's so cute!
I had both the "Little House" and "Narnia" book sets growing up. I thought they were great! Glad to hear they're not "out of style" yet. ;)
Oh, and my mom is a retired kindergarten teacher, so I was bound to be a "reader"... ;)
I love this... And I love your traditions. I have traditions I loved as a child, but my husband grew up without traditions and doesn't see any value in them, so I've been somewhat unmotivated to start them by myself. It's posts like these that get me motivated again. And I love the idea of reading traditions!
I love this post.
MY son's 5th grade teacher had us read aloud to them 15mins per school day and sign a reading sheet.
I did it my son was 10-11yrs at the time.
I read to my 3 yr olds but I hope to keep doing it.
I would love to read Narnia to them.Good idea.
I loved Little House (on the Prarie ?)
What other boys books do you recommend ?
Reading is a priceless gift we can give our children. That and a great education. Lovely post.
A few weeks ago there was an incident at daycare and I should have been more forceful with Lil' Mootz's teachers. I knew at the time I was handling it wrong, but I was afraid of rocking the boat and I shouldn't have been. Thanks for the post - next time it's necessary I'll remember this post and stand up to the teachers.
My mother always read books with me at night and I have always loved the memories I have from the books like Secret Garden. Regardless of what was happening in the book, I think sitting with your parent was one of the safest places to be. Great post. :)
Love this! I'm a huge believer in reading to children -- it was a huge part of my childhood. I remember reading "The Once and Future King" with my dad and it is one of my most indelible and special memories.
I can't wait until the Little One can handle slightly longer books. And I love your choices!
That is great! I don't read out loud to my kids now that they all read well. I keep trying to get in the habit of reading out loud to my youngest daily but it is hard. I bet it would be memories we would cherish forever.
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