I try to sound semi-intelligent when I comment.But, honestly? It's all Greek to me.
I am a slug. Oh sure, I've tried. It always sounds appealing and interesting. No - not the running. Good heavens no. That never sounded appealing. But maybe some other aerobic type exercise. Or yoga. Or pilates.
First, aerobic exercise? They never tell you this up front but that stuff wears you out. I start huffing and puffing and sweating. Awful business. And if you're not careful, you're sore the next day. It's terrible.
Yoga. Now that looked promising. Mostly they just stay in one position. None of that unreasonable bouncing around. What they don't tell you is that gravity works against you in every one of those poses. Plus, I'm old. And stiff. I'm not sure my body ever moved in some of those ways.
Pilates? That would be my niche, I thought. Again, no sudden movements yet they looked like someone who hasn't done time in a circus could possible achieve them. I could get into the positions, I just couldn't repeat them. What is with the obsession on repetitions anyway?
Back to running. Lots and lots of people run in my neighborhood. I see them all the time. Women I know from our kids who are very near my age. Running. In their bras. Oh, I know. They are running bras. When did that become acceptable? If you're young, you're too darn bouncy for those things. And if you're my age, honey, your days of being seen out and about in your undies has come and gone. That is reason enough to never attempt running.
So, I'm doing my own triathlon. First, I nap. Then, I eat something fried - specifically either a potato or corn. They take to deep, hot oil beautifully. Then, I sit on my derriere. And, unlike my athletic friends, I can do this daily or even multiple times a day. In my bra. I'm quite accomplished. You are welcome to join me.
But, I dare say you'll never beat me at my game.
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102 comments:
HA! I just finished my workout for the morning & sat down with your blog & my breakfast. Thanks for the giggle. I think I'm doing the Debbie Triathalon tomorrow. :D
Wait a minute! I think I've been doing pilates in my yoga class!!
I was almost an Olympic contender in two events -- caffeine and nicotine. :P~~~
I am very skilled in those last events you mentioned...when I do my version of the "Ironman" it includes going to the mall, having a pedicure, and hitting the drive thru.
Oh girl. I am a slug as well. I am not coordinated enough for aerobics. I lose my balance doing yoga. I've never tried pilates, but I'm sure I can find a great excuse why I can't physically do it.
I might beat you at your game. I am the Queen Sloth, didn't you know?
BWAHAHAHAHAHA. Now THAT is a regime I can get behind! LOL
I've heard laughter burns a heck of a lot of calories. Perhaps that could be your claim to athletic fame. And you should get calorie credit for all the laughing you help other people do! Too funny!!
Mine would be a quad-athalon. . . 'cause I'd add the consumption of large quantities of wine at the end. . .
All this time we've been "working out" together and never even realized it!
Now that's what I'm talking about. I'm sure there's a way to burn calories while blogging right? Maybe we could create the next "shred while you blog" phenomenon.
Dude, I think with some thought we could make it a decathalon - TV, books, procrastination... I'll think of more later, after I've rested. I mean, trained.
Great plan. Really. No, really.
I love your routine...sounds like mine- chase kids at school for 7 hours. LOL
No THAT is a triathlon I can get behind.....
(LOL at "They never tell you this up front but that stuff wears you out.")
Ellie
Lol you never fail to make me laugh. I like swimming thats about it, never mind that it takes me 5 minutes to swim one lap.
Big boobs here. Big boobs + running = black eyes
I did try laughter yoga a few weeks back. Loved it ! And believe it or not, you actually get a pretty good work out. Just enough soreness in the core muscles the next day to feel like you are alive! I highly recommend it for Slug-types like us !
Happy Friday !
Now this is MY kind of entry! Sitting, napping, eating delectable junk.
Oh yea.
I'll give you a run for your money.
XOXO
So that's what it's called? Now I know what to tell Hubby I did for exercise:P
thinking a lot burns calories!
I used to partake in that kind of exercise - now I enjoy the moving and shaking, pilates, yoga, swimming and Spinning my all time favorite.
You know what I had to do to stick to it? Remember what it was like as a kid riding my bike pretending I was on a motor bike - but the adult twist is I am racing in the spinning class against all the other spinners and its some huge race like the Vualta and after an hour I win or at least place!
Ha - hey its fun and my body is showing the benefit of it!
Right there with ya! I tried the running thing. It's not fun! And I hurt my knee, which was a perfect excuse to stop! LOL
I hate it when I get so lazy that I become like the cartoon woman.
A little exercise every day is what I like.
Secretia
I'm with you, my faithful slug friend.
LMAO! Loved this post! :)
*giggle* Sounds good- I'm in! :) If enough of us join, can we order team jerseys?
I like your form of exercise and I am already good at it! No need to work my way into a goal or new routine.
I don't understand the running thing...I like aerobics though.
I bet that bra makes your workout just plain old sexy....:)))
I'd like to sign up for your workout. I just started The Shred and it's killing me!
You are so creative in giving Webster a run for his money the way you redefine words... like, exercise. Love. it. ;)
Make that a recliner and give me a remote control and I could captain your team :)
there are some of us out there that have small, perky boobies (yes, buying a XS sports bra is quite humiliating) that still run with our shirts on.
nobody but my husband needs to see this, that way if he complains about my spending for running gear, i can always just say "its a for-your-eyes-only project"
We have the same exercise routine! Maybe you and I can form an online support group to check in with each other. YOu know, to make sure we're eating enough potato chips and making sure we're getting very minimal exercise.
Oh the running bra. Really-how hard is it to put a tank top over the thing?
I think I like your mode of exercising much more that the others you listed.
I'm a champ at your triathlon, lol. I do love yoga, and I'm trying to get back into it. The couch though is always ever more appealing...
I'll bring my Ben & Jerry's. And my universal remote. - G
I'm awesome at your version of the triathlon but I keep trying to break it up with three days a week of aerobic kickboxing like it's going to offset all those french fries. Uh huh.
I LOVE YOUR BLOG!
Honey the only running I do is after my almost 2 year old to get her to bed at nap time....or to the fridge for ice cream
Hon, I'm tired just reading about all the activity you engage in.
I love this. Seriously step aerobics about killed me! I am not coordinated for all of this crap. I think that means my core is weak, or something like that. I don't really care, I just can't do it.
Now goats don't do fried but I am down with the other two....
I do a triathalon everday. Breakfast. Lunch. Dinner.
You are so funny! I think are routines are similar since I just finished off a Hostess cupcake!!
That's the first time I've seen someone properly compare pilates to the cirque de soleil!
I used to run your kind of race. I big puffy red heart any kind of pasta, deep fried, and drive thru I can find. But I am short and fat and need to get off my ass.
My dear husband and I thought it would be genius to buy the P90X program for Sweetest day (I know a month away) and we are on day 2.
This shit sucks. I want a big fat pizza puff with a side of cheese fries and a Dr. Pepper to boot please!
Queen of Feisty
Hilarious! I like the way you think... I do get out a lot though as our dog needs a lot of exercise... and I do love escaping to the woods.
I am a slug at heart, but once I gort closer to forty I started mysteriously ganing weight, running is the only way I have kept it off!
When it comes to exercise, you and I are most certainly kindred spirts!
Typo alert -that was supposed to be "Spirits" not sprits. Only thing on me that does move quickly is the damned trigger finger on the enter or "publish your comment" key!
I do yoga, pilates and run triathalons in my mind...does that count? ;-)
I totally LOVE sports bras and yoga pants. Nothing comfier for lounging on the sofa.
Thanks for the laugh!
I got a dog (that I knew would want to be walked) so I'd feel less guilty about my love of fried potatoes and corn...
Hahahaha... now, that's MY kind of triathlon!! :) You know, back when I was fitnessly (yes, i made that up) inspired, i signed up for a half-marathon which happens to take place this coming November. I tell ya, it was the WORST DECISION i ever made. I'm seriously kicking my own butt about it now... because I am nowhere NEAR ready. I'm sooooooo scared for that day to get here!
heh. I do yoga and make myself run, but I'd MUCH rather be involved in your regimine. Ok, with the running at least. I heart yoga.
I really really try to get motivate to do that exercise stuff. I just cant make it work for me.
This is so funny... have a wonderful weekend.
I live THAT kind of exercise! It sure beats lugging laundry up the stairs!
Hahaha! I WISH I could work out! I'm on doctor's orders to chill for a bit while my back rests. I guess I can look at my days of leisure as a decathlon of decadence instead!
The only time I've ever run in my bra in public was when it was 105 in the middle of the summer with 80 percent humidity and the gym's fan went out over the treadmill. I ripped off my shirt while running, looked at the older woman next to me and said, "I'm too hot. Sorry. Can't deal."
She joined me.
Too funny. That is a triathlon I can handle.
I'm with you. I do exercise, but I'm a "lazy exerciser". I don't want sweat too much and I certainly don't want it to hurt nor do I want to gasp for breath. Does this still count as exercise?
Joan Rivers said, "whenever I get the urge to exercise, I lie down until it goes away."
What a funny post!
You better train for your triathlon or you run the risk of injury :-)
And I LOVE your comments on my athletic adventures!!
Ha! I did Pilates today so I could have fried food tonight :-)
You crack me up :-)
xo
I'm in, Deb. Way in. I have never been much for jumping around in public in my underwear. Don't get that one either.
Thanks for making me laugh.
Hilarious Debbie. Thanks for the laugh!
Haha.. your triathlon does sound much more appealing to me:)
I think I could give you a run for your money. Ah ha
Oh, do I ever agree! :)
I'm with you!
I left you an award on my blog...not sure if you do them but I really like your blog and wanted to show my appreciation! Have a great weekend
You're singing my song, girlfriend! Just make sure to stretch really well in preparation so you don't hurt yourself now!!
I like to exercise
my option to sit and watch television.
Perhaps we could start an Olympics of our own?
lol, great idea! I'm in! ha ha ha
I don't know how older people (like myself) lol do these crazy running events. My knees hurt just from watching.
So funny
Running isn't for me either!
Yoga boring, and the other stuff too bouncy.
My fun to do exercise is to laugh at your funny posts! Through the years, we have bought an assortment of exercise equipment that does a great job of collecting dust, so my workout is to dust them...at least until we give them to Goodwill :-)
haha! Loved it! firstly thanks for stopping by my blog (♥) and second, I love your attitude on this. I personally, loved yoga. I did it for a few years, then something magical happened (aka another kid came along) and ruined my dreams of being a yoga queen. Oh I know I could have taken it up again, but damnit sitting on my butt was too cozy.
Running? no thanks, last time I tried that I looked at a window nearby (my gym phase) and got so red in the face I hadn't realised my boobs were about to smack my face. Yes I was wearing a sports bra. But runners don't run with DD's baby. x
Oh, Debbie...you are hilarious!!!! Love this!!! Your exercise plan is PERFECT!!!!! ~Janine XO
Looking good in the running shorts is a feat in and of itself. If only you could stay in shape by eating. Now that would be wonderful.
And here I am trying to fight gravity & age and my love of coffee and m&ms - should I just give in to it? Seems sinful :)
now that's soem special triathlon debbie! it'd run more, but it's too much effort and everything wobbles...
I'm a slug too. I used to be an avid hiker. Still love the IDEA of hiking, but most days my triathlon involves a mad race to get the kids off to school on time, followed by a mid-morning nap event, and finally...second breakfast!
Amusing. I go to the gym 6 times per week but can not say it is fun in any way. Lame but necessary I suppose.
SOOOO funny.
You definitely need to add "wine consumption"
I want to start a martial arts class. I also found a program called "Couch Potato to 5K" that's supposed to guarantee fitness, even to someone like me. Between the two, hopefully I can stop getting winded when I go to the freezer to get more ice cream.
Ha! Hilarious!! I read on a running blog about SRS - Sucky Run Syndrome - and it all came clear. I'm a chronic sufferer of SRS.
I could totally kick your booty at this.
I'm in the advanced class. I do it all without wearing a bra. Snort.
i hear ya! exercise always sounds better in theory than practice. i can be a sucker for those exercise infomericals, too--don't tell, but i own a transfirmer;)
Lol! Totally agree with everything you said!
I like your triathalon the bestest! But then, I am trying to lose weight now----again----so I don't get such treats....sigh...
I am lovin' your idea of a triathlon! Lovin' it!
Whenever I feel like exercising I just lie down until the feeling goes away.
(that's a quote, don't know the author but certainly one of my favs.)
I am really in fish in chips this fall!! Fried food beats running any day.
I have never pondered the woman running in their sports bra? I have been fortunate to have never seen one running in one that should rethink the bra choice.
How about "man boobs" running shirtless?? This is way grosser.
Ahaha I love this post! brilliant! :) Thanks for dropping by my blog and introducing me to your blog!
I look forward to more!
x
LOl Debbie - that is my kind of exercise...you could a new routine ...walk around the block (place a wooden block on the floor...walk three times around it , now put your feet up !)
It is well known at the gym I go there to read my book while I stroll on the treadmill and have more than 30 mins to myself while my 3yr old twins play in the creche !
I keep hoping some of these blogger athletes will inspire me. No luck yet.
I run. I am training for 2 1/2 marathons, 2 weeks apart. I have too much jiggle to go out running in just a sports bra. Couldn't do it....to embarrassing. It's bad enough that I have to look at the bulge, why would I want anyone else to be tormented with it?
Now your triathlon is one I could handle!!
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