I have found that I am limited in what I can expose my children to based on the people I know. Of course, many careers get tremendous exposure from the media. I'm sure that's how little boys and girls have always dreamed of being an astronaut. But think about all the careers that aren't so glamorous and don't get that exposure. How would my children even know to dream of such things?
The struggle goes much further than that. In our society, it seems we limit which careers we think are the correct ones for children to aspire to. My daughter has always wanted to be a teacher. What is the comment she has heard the most often? "Why would you want to do that? You are so smart. You could be anything," Not exactly a glowing recommendation for the esteem teachers receive. However, she has not been dissuaded. But even with the negative comments she received from peers and other adults, she did get tremendous encouragement from her own teachers. And there are multiple community resources and groups for aspiring teachers. We can all continue to hold out hope that some smart people will become teachers.
Not every career path has even that much support. One of my sons wants to be a writer. Oh my. The looks I get from people as a response to that seem to be saying, "Well, at least he doesn't want to be an artist. Still, you'll be supporting him all of his life."
And the community support? Non-existent. At least here. Maybe some of you who live in larger metropolitan areas would have some support. Here, I actually had his sixth grade teacher pull me aside and caution me that I would have to protect him as he grew up so his gift of writing would not be extinguished from him altogether. There's a little parental burden to drop onto someone.Where would any of us be without great writers? What would we have learned in life? Where would the pleasure have come from? Even in this day of technology, we cannot continue to grow and thrive without gifted writers.
So I'm trying. I know nothing about the business of writing but I am blessed to have some friends through this blog that are successful writers that have passed on some tips and encouragement to our family. These women have helped me tremendously. But, it isn't just me and my son they are helping. They reach out to all writers. And they have a wonderful online literary journal that is re-launching this week. I wanted to give each of you the information and encourage you to check it out.
You are cordially invited to attend an "open house" beginning Wednesday, October 14, in honor of the newly renovated Rose &Thorn Journal: http://www.
Drop by, sign up for the newsletter, check out the new digs (and blog!), follow us on Twitter and Facebook, leave us your comments/thoughts, and wish us well!
Rose &Thorn is a quarterly literary journal featuring the voices of emerging and established authors, poets and artists.
Now...go enjoy the open bar and appetizer spread!
Angie Ledbetter &Kathryn Magendie
Co-Editor/Publishers
Rose & Thorn Journal
I hope you will find a little time to show these women some support and encouragement in their efforts.
Posts
60 comments:
What a wonderful aspiration! To be a teacher and a writer. Teachers change so many lives! I hope she will love it more than anything! And a writer! That is exciting. Kaish changes his mind from day to day. This reminded me that he wants me to call the Guiness Book of World Records today to see if he can try to have the worlds loudest scream.... Oh yes he does. : )
Debbie,
I share the support for the Rose and Thorn. I, also, exposed my boys to as much as I could so they could discover their passions. Or learn how to do that throughout their life. Always amazed at the dream killers out there.
Best of luck to your son in his writing. And to your daughter. How we need teachers who have passion for the job.
Neat
Debbie, this is just a great, great post. Mine are still too young to have given serious thought about what they want to do as they age, but it's something we have to be conscious of. Not in a way that discourages, but the opposite. My husband and I want to talk them through their likes and passions, and help them discover ALL the possibilities. How shameful your kids have encountered such unsupportive comments, and from authority figures! Teaching and writer are no less commendable than anything else. I hope your kids realize that and stand strong. Go you!
I think its wonderful that your son wants to be a writer. I know the public library in the (admittedly large) city i grew up in had writer in res programs that also worked with kids. I also attended a young writers camp as a kid. It was an overnight camp for a week with kids ranging from 13 to 18 and we had actual authors there to help mentor and guide us.
I'm def going to check out the Rose and Thorn. Thanks! :)
My kids have such varied interests. My son tho is direction-less at the moment, but I know he'll figure it out for himself. He does like to write song yrics so we'll see.
One of my daughters used to want to be a writer and sit with her laptop in a coffee shop and write a best selling novel. Her plans have changed too and now she wants to be an architect. Whatever my kids want to do, within reason, we'll support them in their dreams. Teacher and writer alike. The future needs people like that!
What a great post! My husband and I feel the same way and talk about this amongst ourselves. He personally always wanted to be a teacher and heard the same stuff and even when he went to college he heard it when he was signing up in the education building! So he switched majors and I'm glad he did because we met. And it never left him so when he was 27 yrs old he went back to school and it all worked out. A good baseball coach once told another son about many careers in sports that are not actually playing the sport.
Good for your kids for pursuing what they like---and good for you for supporting them! Isn't isn't kind of oxy-moronic to disuade a smart person from becoming a teacher...?
linking over now. and i think its great that your children are thinking about careers, not just jobs to make money.
It's incredibly sad that society doesn't support the backbone of our future ~ teachers. If the future generations aren't educated, well, I don't even want to consider the results. Tell your daughter ~ Kudos ~ from her online support!
Also, I think it's wonderful that your son wants to be a writer. It's a gift and something that should be treasured and nurtured. No guilt trip on the parent, this is for him to cultivate and enjoy.
:)
As a teacher and writer, I have to say this really resonates with me. And yet...probably because my own parents were teachers, I've never had anyone try to dissuade me. Or maybe my mind was so set that the detractions just rolled right off my back. But I think it says a lot about you that your kids have chosen those fields instead of "Reality show star" or other things that kids think of as jobs now.
You brought up a great point by mentioning all the great careers that our kids can't dream about because they don't know they exist. In high school, I moved from a teeny tiny town to a large one and was amazed by all the options that suddenly opened up to me. After that realization, I decided I was going to try and expose my children to as many different things as possible...so far, my son wants to be a firefighter (because that's whst his dad is) and my daughter wants to be a princess. I'm hoping she outgrows that...
I think it's great that your son wants to be a writer. It's still my dream too! :)
I'll stop by Rose and Thorn's next. Thanks for the tip.
Enjoy your weekend.
xo
My middle daughter wants to be a day nursery school teacher and she would so fit the bill. Big dreams are great but the little dreams are even greater. Hats off to your son.
Oh my, it took forever for the comment page to pop up. I love your concern about helping children find their passion and run into a good career. Many careers your children will work at have not been invented yet. We must look at providing children with skill sets for many different careers. The child who wants to be a writer for instance, may end up as the communication director for some corporation. He will use his writing skills to promote products or services. He will need both general and specific knowledge which he needs to acquire constantly. So, don't fret, encourage pursuit of knowledge and mastery of skills that can transfer and support passions and talents.
My youngest was a difficult student, bright but lazy. Yet, he had a passion for taking things apart and building stuff. We encouraged him to develop his passion, still insisting he take rigorous school subjects. He ended up becoming an engineer.
p.s. we never know where we'll land during an expedition. But, we know to pack food and a variety of tools and protective devices.
Right now, my son wants to be a garbage truck driver. Not the owner of the garbage company, etc. He wants to be the driver.
It is so scary thinking of the career choices they will eventually make!
I think teaching and writing are both great careers. Good luck to both your children.
You bring up an excellent point! Thank you for pointing out the value of having smart teachers and thank you for pointing out the importance of exposing our children to different careers and supporting them in whatever their passion maybe!
http://www.thewannabewahm.com
I should have gotten a career laying people off, because they are hiring for that these days.
Secretia
It sounds like you have great kids.
I want to grow up and be a writer too!
The world needs more teachers and writers!
what a wonderful idea!!!
its important to find your bliss and pursue it..
Thanks for the tip about Rose and Thorn. As for parents supporting their kids—I wanted to be an actress when I grew up. My dad, in his infinite wisdom, said, "Acting is too unstable a profession. You should be an artist!"
My dad wanted me to be in the military and when I said I was doing theater he compared me to my step brother, a pot smoking guy living in a trailer.
I was going to the UofW and I have made a career from my filmmaking, drama days!
Your kids will be great. They have you for a mother.
I still aspire to be a writer and teacher..maybe not a teacher in a school but a teacher with many things to pass on to my daughters. it is a shame that some jobs get looked down upon.
It is a shame that there isn't more encouragement from community. And that the pressure seems to mount from before they kids start high school! But honestly--it's refreshing to hear about kids who choose a profession out of interest and affinity, and not just because it sounds hip or pays a lot of money.
Kudos to your kid for pursuing their passions and chasing their dreams despite the naysayers. And kudos to you for allowing and encouraging them. Not too many parents would have done that.
Good for you for supporting just what your kids like, and good for your kids for thinking about careers.
It's so important.
Have a great weekend!:)
xx
My son isnt in a traditional college - after high school he went to a guitar repair apprenticeship. Hes learning to be a luthier. Will he go to college, I don't even know. But this is what he wants and this is what he loves... and you know what?
This is what he should do!
Sounds like you are a great inspiration to your children yourself.
Good luck
My mother always thought I'd be a minister, and now look at me.
I'm glad you're the kind of parent that nurtures the dream. My parents never told me what to dream--only that they'd believe in me. It's made all the difference.
Oh dear...you mean my kids are going to grow up and choose their own careers?
I don't think I can handle the lack of control. ;-)
It was in the sixth grade that I determined I wanted to be a writer. I've been writing ever since. And while I haven't hit it "big" yet - i.e. a published book (though I do have a few short stories and articles published), I continue to try and continue to love what I do.
And my daughter wants to be an artist - thankfully, her teachers have really encouraged her in this endeavor and so has my family. I know I encourage her all the time because I see a deep passion in her for her art.
Sounds like your kids have great dreams :) I used to say I wanted to be a writer, and was told it wasn't a proper job... but I'm coming back to it as an adult. There's a thing about being "smart", that people tend to imply (whether deliberately or not) that you should always do the hardest thing you're capable of. But maybe you'd have more fun doing something else. Yep, I have these battles in my head sometimes :)
I am on my way to that journal as we speak. Well, not immediately, you know. I'm still here. Oh, and I'm not technically speaking.
This is a tough subject, and I'm watching my own kids begin to grapple with the question of "what I want to be when I grow up".
People are rarely helpful, it seems. I wish both of your kids all the best in their chosen professions. I've done both in my day, and I wouldn't trade either job for anything in the world.
Uh oh. I want to be a writer too. Guess I'm in trouble, huh? LOL
That's great work you're doing. Your post made me think of the hugely successful Rick Riordan, who was a middle school teacher and author before his Percy Jackson books launched him into orbit as a NY Times bestselling author. It's possible. I say go for it to both your kids.
Your kids are every bit as terrific as you are!!! Applause!!! I'm so glad that you encourage them to hold onto their dreams and to ignore the nay-sayers!!! Kudos to all of you!!! Terrific post, Debbie!!! ~Janine XO
The best encouragement for writing is reading. As you say, where would we be without the great writers?
Another great encouragement is not 'having to', by which I mean not having to write to fit a certain criteria, or write something which ticks all the boxes. I hated English class for that reason, but the moment I finished education I wanted to write.
With you as his mum I'm sure we will excel!
That's really cool:-)
Debbie all the pop ups on your page are making me crazy. I cant seem to block them no matter what my settings are!!!
I figured out how to read your blog finally and that was to simply go to make a comment and then click on show original post.
I totally get where you're coming from on this post. My oldest daughter is a serious brain, she is going to college early next year in 11th grade and no she does not want to be an engineer, she wants to be a veterinarian. Usually when she says this, people act like that career is a waste of her brains.
My youngest, also seriously smarty pants, wants to be a chef. Imagine the responses SHE'll get when she's older.
I think happiness is way more important than prestige or money, way way way more important. Its the ultimate thing to consider in choosing a career.
Debbie, teacher and writer is admirable. I exposed mine to the violin at age 3 then the guitar at age ten. Sports, sewing, frog hunting, horse riding etc...
Wow! That is so discouraging to hear. I would say to any kid that writing well will lead them to having a great career. If you can write you WILL have a job. Seriously important in so many fields. Those who write well get and keep jobs in my field and it is science oriented!
And "too smart" to be a teacher??? I am still shaking my head.
I think that is so awesome that your daughter wants to be a teacher! I have a friend who graduated from UCLA and has been a 2nd grade teacher for many years now. So many people wondered why she chose that profession. But, I know she's happy because she is doing what she loves!
And how wonderful that your son wants to be a writer! It sounds like you have very smart, mature children!
hey... when i was a kid i wanted to be an artist... what are you saying? :) ha ha
so now am i an artist? do i make $ at it? NOPE and NOPE. Oh well :)
Ditto Lizzie. I wanted to be an artist. My dad suggested I'd better learn to type. I've done plenty of typing. Very little art. Off to check out the literary journal.
I bookmarked them, thanks!
I was a teacher and a teacher educator. I was recently really distressed when someone said on her blog that the only requirement for being a teacher is infinite patience. This woman is a teacher! I have been stressing about this for days. People (myself included) often say that teachers don't get enough respect - but if her attitude is prevalent, well, it's no wonder! I, for one, think it is an incredibly valuable field and it takes a very special person with a very specific skill set to do it well. If your daughter is that person, she has made the right choice. Good on her.
As for writing - there are so many places to write! He will find employment! What an amazing skill to possess! Good on him.
And for encouraging them to follow their hearts even when naysayers tell you otherwise? Well, good on you.
Wonderful post! We need good writers. We need their vision, their empathy, their drive/motivation. I think it's wonderful. Writers can bring a community together, a country, a world.
I do think it is our job as parents to guide our children to help them find a career that feeds their soul. It is hard though. And I think in the age of the Internet, it might be easier to nurture a writer than it was before. How about his own mom and her regular writing???? At the minimum, he should blog -- nothing like a blog to force you to write daily and the more you write, the better you get.
Even after I became a teacher in my 20's, people would say to me..."Then what are you going to do?"
Boo hiss.
Lots of my students have become teachers and their parents have not been too thrilled.
However, they former students love it.
I applaud you for supporting your daughters dreams.
Sounds like you're raising kids who are strong enough to aspire outside the box -- good for you!
I'm pretty convinced that if I'd spent the last 35 years practicing writing, instead of computer programming, I'd be able to make a living at it by now. Maybe not a good one, but some kind of living.
My daughter is torn between wanting to be a Coroner and a flight attendant. I know, tough choice.
Well, I am a teacher and a writer, so I hear what you are saying. Ya gotta do what you love.
Off to check out the link. Thanks!
One of your most thought provoking posts.
My husband's a writer. And he teaches screenwriting at the local university. He even pays all of our bills.
I fully support your son in his choice to become a writer. (But he can't come live in my basement! That's saved for my oldest son, our own fledgling writer!)
Oh, and I come from a long, long, long line of life-changing teachers. Totally noble profession.
Your kids are awesome!
Oh, and I'm an artist. And a teacher.
I obviously have plenty to say on this topic.
We are big believers in doing what you love. (Otherwise your work can feel like you're driving to jail every day. )
Thank you *smiling*
I wish there were more dedicated, good teachers. I wish there was a reasonable way to make the pay more attractive because with it so low, one would think only the dedicated people would be there. Not so.
Your son comes by writing naturally.
Post a Comment