Yes, we've all been there. And never mind that in the past year or so, more and more people have been wishing they just had a job, any job, to get up out of that cozy bed and go to. No. Never mind that. Aaron had had enough.What was this cruel work environment Aaron couldn't stand to go into one more day? One of those terrible jobs on that Dirty Jobs show where Mike Rowe has to clean the intestines of animals or some other cringe worthy place? Almost.
Aaron worked at a video store.
Not actual photo of Aaron. I can tell because this guy obviously appreciates his job.I know. Imagine the horror.
So how did Aaron get out of going to work Monday? Police say he stabbed himself in the leg with a knife, inflicted other more superficial wounds to his body, and then claimed three men who were either Hispanic or skinheads had attacked him. Five police units and a K-9 team responded to his call.
Not actual photo of "crime scene". I'm sure Aaron's was more hectic than this.Goodness, Aaron. Didn't you ever hear the one about your grandmother dying?
But, on the bright side, I don't think Aaron is going to have to worry about getting to a job for quite some time.
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63 comments:
How ridiculous! Funny part is since I am from Denver I didn't remember a "C" street or recognize the cop cars so I Googled 1300 C St Denver, CO and figured out where it was. I don't think I could hurt myself like that under any circumstances.
Hmmm, I'll have to remember this. Stab self in leg, avoid going to work. Sounds perfectly (in)sane to me!
Umm...wow. Yeaaaah...
And, woman! Posting on a Thursday?! You're positively going CRAZY. ;-)
And I'm the third comment! Woot!
He should be charged with a hate crime for trying to pin it on the Hispanics. And how can you not be sure if they are Hispanic or skinheads? Seriously? How do you confuse the two groups? Hope this guy appreciates his padded cell...at our expense.
Debbie, I should have known you were going to post about this! I had been toying around with doing a post about jobs that would be worth stabbing myself over. I think I still might someday. In fact, when I read this story, the article didn't say what his job was.
He stole that idea from I think, the movie Platoon. Some guy stabbed himself in the leg during an attack so he could get out of fighting for a while!
What a poser... (as my son would say)
Sad to see good people out of work.
Pretty crazy story. I hope you have a great day.
Hey, I used to work in a video store. I wish I would have thought of this myself, because watching movies all day and snickering at customers renting porn was REALLY stressful, let me tell you.
I'm thinking of stabbing myself in the arm to get out of cooking for the rest of the week.
My local Blockbuster store just closed. Maybe they had to close to avoid employees stabbing themselves?
Loved your line about the dying grandmother. Why do we feel the need for such elaborate (and painful and bloody and fellonious) excuses when a simple one will do?
That was a crazy thing for sure.
What was he thinking...oh that's right he wasn't. Silly me. Quitting would have worked, simple, no blood and painless. Silly boy knives are for dummies.
You know, you are the only other person I have heard talk about blankets being just the right warmth and weight when you wake up in the morning, leading to a firm desire to just stay there. Bloody blankets, however, would motivate me to get up.
Wow! That's very disturbing and hilarious at the same time.
Now that is extreme!
Unbelievable. Seriously..
OH and for the record thank you for reminding me how hot the Dirty Jobs guy is... mmmm....
Hmmm....choosing between a warm bed and stabbing myself in the leg? Really, it's not an easy decision.
What Heidi said.. I would much rather have the weight of blankets than an electric one.. nothing to do with the post I guess but..
That had not occurred to me! I don't think I could stab myself though.
Maybe I'll just say that 3 guys came into my home and MADE me drink beer and eat pizza for hours! The nerve!
http://www.thewannabewahm.com
I heard about this yestersday. Phil Williams called the BBV store and asked about Aaron, they wouldn't give out any info, so he asked them if they had a movie titled, "I Stabbed Myself Because I Didn't Want to Work at Blockbuster Video Today".
I was just thinking about my job and how much I hate it. I never thought of the "stabbing yourself in the leg" approach.
I have to go see if this steak knife is sharp enough.
I've come up with some whoppers to get out of work but that's ridiculous!! Sheesh
Debbie, that is too crazy!.
Debbie, that is too crazy!.
Wow. People never cease to amaze.
The lengths people will go to... Talk about crying wolf!
Isn't there some workman's comp for that?
"Injured on the job? Or trying to get out of the job? Call the law offices of Stabb & Buhlschitt. Now!"
Some people's kids...
Oh the stupidity of some people!
I'm going to go stab myself in the leg so I can't do laundry.
I don't even know what to say. I'm speechless.
hmm... I wonder if the video store cancelled his health insurance after he stabbed himself?
Seriously? This is ALMOST unbelievable... but not quite. What an idiot!
Just call and say you have explosive diarrhea, for craps sake.
I yi yi!!!! These are certainly strange time.
xo
What a douche...dude gets to watch TV all day, hello dream job!
If I stab myself in the leg do I get out of playing mummy today? Hmmmmm
What is this? Hoax central? It seems everyone lately has been making crap up to get out of something or other. A guy near where I lived beat the crap out of himself, killed his own dog, and blamed it on a robbery gone wrong. The police said it was because of some money issues. Too bad for him that the state is making him pay for all the wasted police work and resources. Poor dog.
Um, I think I might have hated gym class that much.
I'm just going to say, at least he only stabbed himself (idiot).
And as taxpayers I'm sure we paid for his medical care.
I hope they charge him for the police response.
I hope he learns to appreciate what he has.
Although I suppose one could say he was helping to keep others employed. (note heavy sarcasm.....)
What is this world coming to? Nevermind. Don't answer that. I don't wanna know. =)
The human race never fails to amaze me.
I once told bennigans that my roomate overdosed on cocaine, so I wouldn't be able to come in.
As a general rule, one should not inflict pain on one's self to avoid work.
Unbelievable...I'm speechless! Wow! You always make me think...whether through humor or gentle, satirical commentary!!! ~Janine XO
Now, now, we mustn't judge. He might have just slipped.
You know, a dozen times.
And the police report was just a slip of the tongue.
Who hasn't accidentally called the cops and blamed imaginary assailants for an attack that didn't happen?
Aaron might get a job that never ends very soon. And the pay will just stink. hehe
They should make a straight to video movie about it!
*groan* you just had to talk about blankets, didn't you?!? Luckily, its almost the weekend!!
That is just too much! Some people!
LOL! What a horrible job (insert heavy sarcasm here)! Think I'll stab myself next time I need a sick day:)
Oh my goodness gracious, really? Man up! Sheesh.
....and it was all caught on film, right?
Man....:)
Sounds like a perfectly insane excuse to me!
I'm thinking he should have just said "swine flu". People totally would have bought it.
What a wacko! I enjoy your posts so much. But, today I read all these comments. Just as funny. My favorite is: If I stab myself in the leg, can I get out of doing laundry? My sentiments exactly. My husband would say, "Man up, woman!" :) I forgot how cute the Dirty Jobs guy was, too. I loved watching him. On another note, I finally caught up on the other posts, Vogue post: hilarious. Amy Winehouse: ridiculous. I just love love love reading your thoughts. And by the way, I have done the same exact thing, plucking the forest from around my eyes...just so you know. Have a great weekend.
Great story! Poor Aaron.
Ummmmm....
Aaron is obviously not the brightest bulb on the tree. I hope he gets in trouble for taking up the time (and tax payer dollars) of involving the police. I'll say it.... What an idiot!
He could have used the excuse my FIL gave to call of my husband from school one day: Dutch Elm's disease.
Oh my goodness! how strange I would think theres got to be a better way...
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have been there, dying to stay in bed. But never thought of inflicting pain on myself. Not that much anyway.
Jeez ... seems like a bit of overkill to me. I worked in a video store once ... it isn't THAT bad!
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