We are a thin family.
Both my husband and I are thin people. We've always been thin. Back when we were dating, my best friend (and future maid of honor) stated in her most country voice that if we ever got married and had kids, we'd "just have twigs".
Now, the beauty of middle age has given my husband and me a little cushion we didn't quite have in the prior 45 years.
But my kids? Twigs. Just little sticks. Actually tall sticks. They also got the tall gene.
Why am I telling you this? Because although I know people can be very cruel to overweight individuals, there is also a bias in our culture against skinny people. Yes, I do believe that. Anyone and everyone feels like they have a right to walk up to my kids and comment on how thin they are. To ask if they have an eating disorder. To tell them how lucky they are. Or to ask me if they eat well.
And that's wrong. And harmful. Very harmful to my kids. I know people think it is harmless, that we are lucky to be thin, that being thin is such a great thing that calling undue attention to it can't possibly be bad.
But it can.
Each and every year in their health classes they become the focus of attention when the topic turns to eating disorders. Which my kids do not have. My kids have tall, skinny genes. And tall, skinny jeans.
Other kids are allowed to say things to my kids about their size. Things I don't think would be allowed if my kids were obese.
In our school system, we now have a paid position that is solely for student, family, and community health. It was created as a response to the obesity problem that is plaguing our nation. As one of the initiatives, each child is weighed and their height measured annually. In a class. Where other children are present.
My kids weigh what most of their classmates weighed 5 or more years ago. That's fine with me. And fine with my children's doctors who say my kids are extremely healthy.
Yet, when we allowed our first child to participate in this program, we received a letter at home telling us our child was critically underweight and that we should consider feeding him a balanced diet.
The balanced diet he has been offered all of his life is one of the contributing factors to his lack of obesity. It is hard to pack on the pounds eating fresh fruits, veggies, and lean meat. With the occasional trip to Chick-fil-A because after all, all things in moderation.
So now I send a letter each year saying my kids are not allowed to be weighed. I'll keep up with their health and the school can teach them algebra.
It's difficult to raise kids with the constant onslaught of media and lifestyles that so many of us do not think are healthy for our kids. I want my children to have a healthy acceptance of their body type.
Even if they are skinny.
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112 comments:
Unbelievable.
You know, the schools might take a better look at themselves first. No vending machines of any kind (lets face it, if its in a vending machine its got something unhealthy in it to keep it edible) and those school lunches!!!! Please. Our system has pizza EVERY Friday.
I can't believe that the school would actually think it was OK to weigh kids in front of one another! The school has no business trying to shame kids into reaching the right weight(whatever that is??) - G
You are a very good mother.
And smart too!
Secretia
Right with you. Our petite but perfectly healthy daughter of 17 years has suffered from the same thing.
And the food police make my blood boil
Wow, you're right.
And no kid should be weighed in front of their peers.
That is really too bad. They used to say that to my daughter and then she gained 5 pounds and they said she should watch her weight!!! People are idiots!
Yes good point. One I have never had mind you.
I have two really skinny kids. We eat dinner together (every night! Except during baseball/softball season) so I watch those two PUT IT WAY! And never gain an ounce! But I'm with you I try to serve healthy food. Really, with the high drop out rates and lack of actual knowledge - the schools need to worry more about TEACHING our kids and less about PARENTING our kids.
AMEN!
I absolutely would not have allowed my kids to participate in that, either. I drew the "short, fat" end of the genetic stick, and I can't imagine the horror if I had been weighed in front of the class!
As a child, I didn't exercise enough (I was a reader) but my diet was very healthy. I can't tell you how much pain there was when supposedly "well-meaning" people would tell me to cut out the junk food I didn't eat.
My daughter was JUST weighed last week and though she wasn't surprised by her healthy weight, her friend who has some "extra cush" herself was obviously embarrassed by it. I just don't understand why SCHOOLS find it necessary to do this...and you're right skinnies get just as much flack for the weight (or lack thereof) than people who are overweight. Drives me nuts!!!
I can't believe the school had the gall to send you a note suggesting you feed them a balanced diet. WOW.
there are so many double standards that this world has...like your kids are facing.
my cousin was smoking on his college campus and a large lady walked up to him (that he didn't know) and said "smoking can kill you ya know"
so without missing a beat, he pulled out the pack of cigerettes and said "yeah, and they can also make you skinny. want one?"
she was terribly offended, but i'm not sure what in her head made it okay to comment on the spec in his eye when the plank of obesite was lodged squarely in her own.
Great point!
Thank goodness there is no weighing at our school. When we hear this in news reports we groan about how it is one more thing that teachers should not have to do. Parents really need to raise their voice at public meetings if they do not already. Mine are not tall but have zero fat thin genes and wear skinny jeans. :) My thin genes retired a couple years ago and morphed into muffin top.
I remember the teasing when I was a kid. I was super teeny-tiny. You're right that it's not considered appropriate to say something about an obese person's size, yet thin people receive comments quite often.
Great idea on sending the note!
Oooooohh...I hope our school doesn't start doing this! How embarrassing for the kids who aren't "perfect!" I just wish they would take the ICE CREAM out of the cafeteria! My kid keeps trying to sneak money to school to buy some. I don't think they should have desserts at school. If they're still hungry, let them eat the carrots instead of throwing them in the trash.
I have a few cousins that are all rail thin and about 6' or taller and they get hounded all the time at school. It is absolutely ridiculous!!! Good for you shining the light on how thin people are ridiculed too. I don't think people realize this. We idolize skinny on the screen but in real life notsomuch. Great post woman!
I would be miffed too! Good for you for standing up for your kids and protecting them.
I'm not gonna lie---jealousy is turning me a little green right now what with my short, easy-to-tell-if-you-gained-three-pounds genes. But I would never tell a skinny person they have an eating disorder any more than I'd tell an overweight person that! (Although I may secretly wish I could just give them five of my own pounds.)
I'm SO glad you told the school you'll weigh your own kids. Where do they get off doing that? I hate that school's are trying more and more to take over the role of parents!
Granted my kids are only 10 and 6 but it is nothing new to hear the same comments! When my daughter was born she was 5 lbs 14 oz. When I was born I was 5lbs 7 oz. My family makes little babies, and kids. I now stand 5 foot tall and at my ideal weight which I finally reached before I got pregnant I was 125, I was in the average for my height. My daughter is tall and skinny, my son is lean and skinny. I grew up with people telling me how little I was I still hear it. Doctors used to tell me to force my children to eat since at a year they barley made 20lbs. But they ate healthy well balanced diets. They grew and reached mile stones on schedule. They were just petite. They still are and I would say 85% of the kids in their school are overweight. We dont do juice, junk food or soda. We eat out kids are taught to make healthy choices. I see what others feed their kids and then wonder why they dont understand why their 3 year old is pushing 90 lbs. I know how you feel, and i wrote a crap load lol.
I understand that there are cases of obesity that are not easily controlled. I also understand that some parents just hate saying no or go to what is easier in the long run which kills their kids over time. Some parents just need to grow a set. I control what goes in my kids mouth, its called dont buy the junk". Im so damn mean.
Good post; something that most people just don't think about. When I was super duper skinny, from chemo, people would make comments "bitch, look how skinny you are!" WTF?
You are a good mom!
xo, Mango
The fact that you were sent a letter about your children about their weight makes my blood boil. The fact that they weigh the kids to begin with...I thought that was phased out during the cold war!
grrrrrrrrrr
Good for you, Debbie. I applaud you!
Ri-FREAKIN'-diculous!!! I have so many issues with this, but I'll spare you. Good for you for sticking up for your kids & putting your foot down!
Alright, alright ... I'm sorry!
Seriously though, I am one of those people who would tell your kids they were 'lucky to be skinny'.
I'll smarten up now ... I PROMISE!
Looks like your neighbors might have more important things to worry about.
I didn't get 'fat' until I got married, and was a skinny kid and young man. I don't recall ever feeling awkward about it though.
They weigh the kids in front of each other?! That is ridiculous! That is probably going to cause some eating disorders. What are they thinking?
I know what you mean. I was 105 lbs throughout my 20's (in between pregnancies, obviously:) and I had a few people talk to me about how they were concerned about me and how I obviously wasn't eating enough. It sooooo pissed me off! I felt the same as you -- why is ok to say something like that to a skinny person, but not a fat one. AND I did not have an eating disorder.
How terrible!! Weighing the kids in front of classmates?!?! You've got to be kidding me. My husband has the skinny gene too. I do think he's lucky in a way. Only bcs I know what it's like to be mad at yourself for some extra pounds. And because that gene doesn't seem to have any unhealthy health issues that accompany it.... My sister got it too and I've had to defend her on a number of occasions with the eating disorder comments.
There is definitely a sort of reverse discrimination, if you will, against skinny people.
My oldest is very lean and she's short like me. The pediatric nurse had the gall to mention when my child she was on the low end of the growth chart because of her height and weight. She said this in front of my four year old. I guess they don't teach heredity or tact in the nursing school she attnded! Up until about two years ago, my daughter had issues bacuase of the height comment by the nurse.
So, so difficult. Sounds like you've been the perfect Mama for your fantastic children. Isn't it amazing what advice people will offer you? Gah.
As long as your kids know that they are perfectly normal and healthy, phooey on the others.
Aarrrgh! Weighing in at school in front of their peers! How awful--for both those overweight and underweight. WTF genius thought up that idea??
I here ya!! I grew up thin and was always made to feel like something was wrong with me because I was too thin or didn't eat enough. I was afraid that if I did gain weight people wouldn’t like me anymore. Why can't we just appreciate individuals for their positive attributes without making them feel wrong about themselves?
“You have beautiful eyes.”
“What a good writer you are.”
“I love to hear you laugh.”
Lets try to GIVE confidence.
so, uncharacteristically of me, I'm going to get on my soapbox, and hopefully, not spark a full-fledged battle on your comments.
It's all our fault. I'm from the state that previously-obese-but-now-thinner-but-his-family's-still-on-the-obese-scale Mike Huckabee famously announced that if we'd all quit eating McDonald's we'd be fine and instituted mandatory BMI measurements in school that "surprisingly" led to decreased obese people in the state. . .never mind the padded numbers, because they sure didn't when he ran for prez on his "skinny" platform. My kids eat junk food WAY too often (and I can't emphasize that "way" too much), but they will always be "healthier" (at least on paper) than their stockily built cousins. We too have the thin, tall genes, although ours tend to create a "spread" at 18 or so. . .Mr. Huckabee also prevented parents from bringing in unhealthy snacks to school, but you should see what's classified as healthy and what isn't. IMO it's created a far more unhealthy attitude towards body weight and image than what was previously present. Thanks again, Mr. Huckabee. . .Sorry, if you get flack from the crazy woman that posted a rant to Mr. H on your blog! I promise not to ever again. . .unless you mention the Duggar's. : ) (I actually love the state of Arkansas, but I don't understand why the crazies are the only ones people hear about being from here. . .)
I can totally identify with this post. I was always thin. In 1990 I was 111 pounds. Sadly..age has taken care of that but I loved being that little. Shopping was wonderful. The downside of that was always being questioned about anorexia. I wasn't THAT. People would come up and tell me I was too thin. Now...would those same people go up to someone very obese and say they are fat? No. So is it jealousy that makes them do that? Probably.
It is unbelievable that a school would weight children in front of each other. Good for you for standing up for your children.
And you are right - people can say the rudest things. My boys are naturally thin and I have had people (even my own mother) advise me to "feed them"... after all, I'm a cook... believe me - they eat and eat and eat...
my husband and I are skinny too! Although I am extremely blessed, I know Olivia will go through all the things I did when I was whopping 98lbs soaking wet in highschool.
I dont think I would want my daughter weighed. that's just mean. :( I just cant get over it! I think if you are healthy and eat well, who cares what the number say on the scale.
Weighed in class in front of everyone? Yeah, I'd send a letter too but I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be polite.
My kids are super tall and skinny too. You wouldn't believe the kind of comments I get about it (well, you would since you DO!) It makes me crazy because they have hollow legs and try to fill them all day long but people just see their tiny size and lankiness and just think I'm starving them. (It probably doesn't help that I'm not a twig myself) but they see their dad and then it all becomes clear. The ultimate Tall and Skinny.
We have the same problem in my family. My Mom is skinny, I'm skinny (though with just a tad of cushion now). All 3 of my kids are skinny, but they are not that tall. Their Dad is short so I have short skinny kids. My daughter usually got the looks during health class and she gets tired of everyone saying "your sooo skinny"
What is worse though is when they were ages 3 to teens it was the in-laws that were awful. Especially my first born. He was small, short.. and the my husbands sisters were awful. They would outright tell me I wasn't feeding them properly and that he wasn't growing etc. For God's sake their Dad is only 5'7"...
I remember going to my pediatrician and asking him and he was so upset that they were making me feel bad. My kids were and are always healthy.
You are right there is such a bias.
I'm normal now but I grew up super skinny thanks to genetics. I got really sick of the eating disorder questions but those were usually put to rest when anyone saw me actually eat. I had a healthy appetite. I just lucked out with a really fast metabolism, too.
That's so true. You're either too skinny, or too fat. You're never perfect. I work out all the time and I'm either told that I need to cut more weight to fit the fitness standard, while everyone else thinks I'm too thin. Kudos to you for defending your kids!
It's like you can't win no matter what you do.
To heck with 'em.
Their good diet will serve them well in the long run. Good parenting job.
Well, that's just ridiculous. And annoying. I can't believe they weight them IN FRONT of each other... ?????
Good for you! My kids are on the small-ish side according to almost every pediatrician I've ever met. I even had a guy tell me that my son needed to see an endocrinologist about growth hormone or some such nonsense. Riley was 18 months at the time. And then I met our current pediatrician, who asked me valid questions like, "Do you feel like your children are healthy?" or "If you think they are doing well, then don't pay any attention to the percentage on this chart." I love her. A lot.
My oldest son is SKINNY and on the tall side. My mom constantly says things like "Oh my, I can see his ribs" and such. One time, she compared him to an adult friend who now has various health issues due to anorexia as a teen. I bascially told my mom, "You can worry about this if you want, but he eats and our medical professionals say he is healthy." She hasn't mentioned it since.
Good for you. I don't think kids should be weighed in front of others.
Well said and posted!!!
My kids are the same way. It is frustrating when people assume they're younger than they really are b/c of their size. I know my oldest is started to get self-conscious about it.
Only a mother knows what's best for their children.
I had a friend in elementary school who was teased about being skinny. She has had the last laugh, because she now looks great and most everyone else has a few too many pounds on them!
You are so right though - I think people are more careful of saying things about being overweight, and think nothing of saying someone is skinny.
I think it would be an excellent idea if all children escaped being weighed! Feed them a healthy diet, make them get some exercise, and damn the scale!
Ah yes, the world is full of uneducated critics making snap judgments. Good for you for stepping in and speaking up for your twigs.
A friend told me of this practice - and how she wrote to ask that her child who was a little larger than others not be weighed either. Seems she had a similar experience as a child, in school. Devastated her so that she still recalls the humiliation. Teaching algebra instead, indeed!
Weighing the kids in class in front of everyone is insanity. I can remember going to slumber parties as a young teen and praying that we wouldn't weigh each other-I'm not sure why I thought we might, but it must have been something that had happened at a slumber party at one time. My youngest daughter was, and still is, very thin and heard all of those awful comments also.
Weighing kids in front of thier peers is just insanity. It is opening doors that don't need to be opened. It is allowing someone to try and dictate what is best for you and your family. They ought to worry about their own kids rather than the rest of the kids. Let parents be parents.
My children were so tall and lean that, in high school, they called to tell me my daughter MUST HAVE either an eating disorder or a drug problem.
To appease them, we went to the doctor and had the full gambit of tests. The result? Tall, skinny kid gene.
The school never offered to pay for the doctor bill or tests..... ;)
My children were so tall and lean that, in high school, they called to tell me my daughter MUST HAVE either an eating disorder or a drug problem.
To appease them, we went to the doctor and had the full gambit of tests. The result? Tall, skinny kid gene.
The school never offered to pay for the doctor bill or tests..... ;)
deb, I went through a lot of this with my daughter being naturally tall -- and rail thin. Over the years it has been horrid, at times beaten her down, especially from the adults and their tacky, hurtful comments they've given her. One day the lunch ladies made fun of her at school and, well, I lost it and loosing it helped. Your a good mum!
I have five granddaughters and they all have a morphed body image!! It breaks my heart.
Good for you standing up against the school policy. That is insane!! Peer pressure is bad enough!
Hugs
SueAnn
Wild. This makes me think of a recent conversation with a friend in which we said at the same time shrinks and wanna-be shrinks are always turning virtues into symptoms of serious psychological problems. For example: Do you work hard? That is OCD? Are you happy? Denial. Honest? Can't function in social settings.
A healthy weight? Your mother doesn't feed you. Clearly.
What a mad, mad, mad world!
No child should be weighed in front of another...we adults don't like it why should they!!
Good for you, telling the school your kids were not going to be weighed in front of others. Are they crazy?? I feel sorry for the other kids who are humiliated each year.
My 19-year-old is 6'4" and weighs 155 lbs, so I know what you mean. He eats and snacks.
My first child was super skinny as a child, mainly because we were eating healthy, i.e. like you said, fresh veggies just don't pack on the pounds. When her pediatrician remarked that feeding her love of raw veggies weren't going to help her gain weight, I asked him, so you want me to feed her junk food? And he sheepishly admitted, no....
So good for your healthy kids.
I cannot believe that they are weighed in front of the whole class! Must be terrible for all those kids who are not in the 'norm' figures.
My kids have always been skinny also---and I was skinny---note, I said WAS...so I can relate!
I always had doctors tell me that I needed to feed my kids more junk, because they were too thin----uh, huh...
Great post---I have a friend's daughter who would never wear shorts here in AZ because people teased her about her thin legs----we all need to be more accepting--great reminder.
Happy Sat. Sharefest
Amen! I wish the schools would spend the time teaching kids acceptance and respect of others rather than weighing them.
My children went to an elementary school that eliminated recess and cut gym class to just once a week.
It's good to hear your side of the story. When I read the first line about your thinness, my brain was already working on a snarky comment. Until I read the rest of it. On behalf of all us fatties out there, I'm sorry. Please forgive us! I'm glad you can understand where it comes from (world views on fat vs. skinny) and still make a good post explaining why it's not ok to talk to your kids/family about it. And I admire your standing up to the school - I can't imagine how insulting that must be when they say you don't feed your kids right!
Well done!
Thanks for stopping by and for your lovely comment! thanks!
I totally get this...my girls and I a are skinny's too...two of us do have medical conditions now...but we were skinny before we were sick...The whole focus on obesity in health class is very confusing for my 13 year old who is under medical care due to low weight (because of crohn's disease)...we had to get written permission from her doctor in order for her to be able to have juice at school instead of water (she needs the calories)...shopping for skinny people is a nightmare...it's much easier to find extra large sizes for teens (and adults) than 00's for my daughter or even 3's for me!
I hear you, I really do!
That is annoying! I have skinny kids too. Hubby says better too skinny than too fat. In all seriousness, my biggest kid is my 9 year old boy, he looks thin but he is a solid 80 pounds and 4'8". In contrast my almost 7 year old finally hit 40 pounds, thank the Lord! My sister had the same small frame, slender build, and shorter genes and now is blessed in her mid-twenties to still be extremely thin. As long as their doctor is not concerned I think people should but out.
Incredible. I can't imagine how damaging a public weigh in was/is for so many of those children, be they thin or obese
i can't believe your district does that. how horrifying for the children to be weighed publicly.
you're right that there is an accepted cultural bias against thin. my daughter at two only weighs 21 lbs, and her doctor has FINALLY conceded that she is healthy--forgeting that those baby growth charts are skewed towards formula fed babies who are bigger and often fatter.
This post is so important and I would of never realized how a thin family would cope being asked these questions and being the centre of debate that has no relavance to you actual life.
You are so right!
My mum says when she sees someone tall and thin, "he or she will have a long life" So you are the perfect build!
Have a great Christmas!
Hugz!
Julie
The thing that jumped out at me was how people tell your kids how "lucky" they are. Healthy is hard work not luck. And if the schools put half the time into planning lunches and more physical activity as they do on the "weigh ins" there would be half the problems.
Un-freaking-real. Go ahead, "authorities"---create a self-esteem issue in a child, or an eating disorder. Holy crap: public weighings and letters like that to you?
Bloody hell....
They weigh them IN CLASS?
That's sick.
I bet a lot of kids get an eating disorder from having to go through that.
As far as ED:s go, let's just say I've been there. I thought I was unbelievably fat (I was thinner than I am now) and went straight downhill.
The norm right now is that thin equals beautiful or possibly ill - but don't we envy even some of the realllly skinny models? I think that perhaps some of the accusations towards naturally thin persons have more to do with jealousy than concern. I'm jealous right now that I'm not as thin as you and your family and I haven't even seen you.
---^--- I meant to say I was MUCH thinner than I am now when I started "dieting". And went downhill from there. :-S
Enough about that.
P.S. thank you for your lovely lovely comment :)
I'm making a very belated return visit to your blog.
One of my children is also very skinny. He's in the 5th percentile for weight and we've been told that he's "failure to thrive", which he's not. He's just small...and I'm okay with that.
Yes, eating healthy does make one thin!!!! And is truly a blessing...but I can tell you that I felt unattractive for years after being called skinny in high school...Sigh...funny how an advantage can be turned to a disadvantage...Glad you like Chick-fil-A...we own a franchise...If you ever come our way, lunch's on me ;-) Excellent post!!! You bring such a unique and wise perspective to everything you write!!! I'm so grateful to know you!!!! You're a treasure! Love you!!! And Merry Christmas~Janine XO
I've never given much thought to this reverse discrimination. And I have to agree with the other commenter who stated how damaging it is to weigh kids in front of their peers. Think about how humiliating this must be for the overweight kids as well as the underweight kids. What a terrible idea.
That is just insane! If I had to be weighed in front of my class in high school I would have burst into tears and ran out of the room.
Good for you for sticking up for your kids!
Great post! My kids both rank 10% on the growth chart. They are too young to get a lot of slack now but something to look forward to. Ugh!
I'm so glad you are sticking up for your kids. I think that sucks that they are weighing kids in school now.
I have skinny kids and skinny grandkids. I used to be so skinny the kids made fun of me. Now I am fat...I think from all the years of being made fun of, I went the opposite way. I hope my grandkids don't let the teasing get to them.
I made my way to a blog that i really love! Good for you Debbie, you're just an excellent mother!
Thanks for your lovely comments.
hugs hugs
Thanks for stopping by my blog to lend support. I'm going through it right now - but this season will not last for long. I just have to 'do me right now.' I'll come back to blogging soon.
Oh my gosh! They weighed your kids in front of their peers?? Talk about a recipe for major disaster and insecurity among anyone at all who is struggling with any form of self image. What a rotten thing for the school system to do!
My kids are super skinny too. My husband is all and has always been more lean. I'm really short and have always been a rather normal petite size, but we were both really little and skinny as kids and we get comments about our children too. People jokingly tell us we should put butter on their toast etc. They are very active, and play outside a ton. Plus I have always limited the sugar and snacks that aren't good for them, so I agree with you!!
I can't believe they weighed them and sent home that letter. Jerks.
A-freakin-men, Debbie. I am naturally tiny and get SO sick of people saying things like, "Girl, you better eat...you're going to waste away." Um...I do eat. Just because I'm not large doesn't mean I have an eating disorder. I exercise daily because my JOB is dance...and I eat what I want. GROWL!
I grew up tall and skinny (not so skinny anymore) and I remember lots of running commentary on my body. I don't know why people think it's okay to just put their issues on you period. It's inconsiderate, disrespectful, and wrong. As far as the weighing in program, I can't think of anything more mortifying if you are not "just right" except maybe having to take a group shower after beign weighed in.
I like the fancy dress on the header.
It is unbelievable! Great post Debbie! My son's school doesn't do this.
This is very interesting.
I am fat and I honestly never thought of it as reversed bias.
Thank you for opening my eyes.
What a great Mother you are! Merry Christmas to you and your family!
Thank you so much for stopping by. I love your blog!I'm following you too. Blessings to you my dear!
It's a shame people have to spend entirely too much time worrying about other people's kids. Particularly when it's not justified.
Anorexics have pretty much ruined it for the naturally skinny people, I guess.
A-freaking-men! I couldn't stand this when I was younger. I had a very obese aunt who used to make comments about me and my Mum. Said aunt actually told me I should gain ten pounds to which I asked if she was donating. She was so horrified! It is NOT ok for you to comment on my weight and expect me to sit and be quiet. On the topic of weighing kids in front of eachother, that's a recipe for disaster, especially amongst the young girls. How sad!
http://www.justlikejune.com
I hear what you saying here! I am by no shape of the word skinny, in fact I am what I like to call "fluffy". However, people never come to me saying "My God, look at your mid-section, you could park a truck in there" because they know that would be rude. For some reason we feel like we are allowed to do that to skinny people because we want so much to be one ourselves! Thanks for writing this, maybe you will open some eyes! Thanks for dropping by my blog yesterday hope to hear from you again soon!
Very true. There is a bias against skinny folk. Having been a skinny kid, I know how it feels when people think it's ok to tell you "the wind will blow you away" and ask abt any eating disorder.
Interesting read.
Here from serenityville.
wow!
my mom had to deal with the questions from docs and teachers when i was growing up. i was always the tallest and skinniest kid in the class. my nicknames were "beanpole" or "mommy long legs." there was a boy named, "daddy long legs." it hurt. all my friends were developed and i still looked like a boy at 16. i was a late bloomer. once everyone caught up to my height i felt more confident in HS, but the skinniness was always an issue, until i got to college. partying and getting married and having a baby have put me at the weight i should be at for my height. prior to that i was always 10-15 lbs. underweight. take care and thanks for sharing.
Nice. I am on this side: We NEED your children to balance the pudgier ones. Otherwise the statistics would be even higher for obesity, right?
I get pretty sad when i see some of the larger kids walking down the halls these days. The younger classes are getting heavier and heavier already.
EXACTLY!! I have been skinny my whole life (except for the last eight years of midlife), and I always ate well -- and usually more than the guys around me. And I can't tell you how many times someone has looked down her nose at me and asked if I was anorexic. It wouldn't be okay for me to ask a heavy person, "Can you not stop eating, or what?" My daughters are the same way. We just have the skinny gene, curse or blessing or whatever. I'm glad you brought this out and you're getting so many comments on it.
Plus, whose idea was it to weigh kids in front of each other? That's just stupid.
I realize that I'm comment #104, but I just had to weigh in on this one (pun, sadly, intended).
Honestly, I feel the same way about the DARE program they have for 5th graders. How many more "programs" do we have to implement in order to do for kids what FAMILIES were intended to do for them?
I don't want to hear ANY of the school district's opinions on so-called "social" issues. The fact that I have college aged kids FAILING college algebra tells me that we are spending waaaay too much time worrying about the wrong things in our public schools.
Reason number 9,012 why I don't teach school.
The things I am now seeing at school is nuts to me. My kid is in kindergarten and I already see how things are shaping up in this area. My kids are like yours through the same means of feeding and genes. I hope things don't get worse further on...
Wow I've sadly always been on the other side fighting to loose weight and keep it off when I do. I remember the weight in in front of other kids the gym teacher who herself wasn't fit would then make comments about my weight. They would then do that pinch test pulling your skin to measure and that also would lead to comments in front of the other kids yet again. Left a hard reality of what I would deal with being an overweight in adulthood.
That's crazy! I'm assuming the TEACHERS and ADMINISTRATORS didn't weigh THEMSELVES in front of each other or the students?!?!
I've experience the same "skin and bones" comments with my godson. He's a very small kid (who, by the weigh, eats very healthy foods) and for a while teachers treated him like a pet or a party favor because he was so "cute".
Grrrrr.
xo
Extremes will always be criticized - even when they're perfectly healthy. I worry about my son who is also tall but very stocky. I don't want him to be that "huge kid." Can't say that I'm feeding him a lot of veggies. But he doesn't sit on the couch eating chips. He's one of the most active four year olds I know. He just got some big boy genes (which is extremely inconvenient for me since I have to buy his big boy jeans online).
As for weighing kids at school in front of their peers? That sounds like something that schools would do years ago when nuns were slapping hands with rulers and bullying was largely chalked up to kids just being kids...
I find it ironic that the school folks (who are supposed to be educated and somewhat intelligent people), don't take the time to consider genetics as a factor in weight.
And I CANNOT BELIEVE they'd allow these kids to be weighed in front of the rest of their classmates! Are they TRYING to cause eating disorders? Geesh!
I find it ironic that the school folks (who are supposed to be educated and somewhat intelligent people), don't take the time to consider genetics as a factor in weight.
And I CANNOT BELIEVE they'd allow these kids to be weighed in front of the rest of their classmates! Are they TRYING to cause eating disorders? Geesh!
Hi, Thank you for your comment.
Schools have over stepped their bounds way too many times. They should be stopped. The only place a child should be weighed is at home or in the Dr's office.
You are 100% a great mom.
My older son too is tall and skinny (the other is still a baby) and we get regular comments from our friends that he's slowly disappearing. He actually doesn't eat much in front of them (when we have dinner together) coz he's too excited and so out of habit, I feed him before the party. As a result, they think he's undernourished. Its amusing to me (and I generally don't bother addressing the remarks) coz of all the kids, mine is actually the healthiest, who hardly ever falls ill and has the most energy but somehow, since he doesn't have any fat on him, he's considered sickly!!
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